How do you rebuild confidence after a really rough year?

[Neurodiversemom]

This last year has really knocked my confidence and I don’t feel like myself anymore. Everything feels harder and I second-guess myself a lot.

For anyone who’s been through similar, what genuinely helped you rebuild confidence? Small steps, time, therapy, anything?

Try to look at the things that knocked your confidence analytically – best done by writing them down (it makes it easier to remove the emotion). What did you learn, what, if anything, could you do differently.

Sometimes we go through shit times and there's nothing we can do, other than grit our teeth and power through. As humans we are programmed to be more negative than positive but there are positives to be found in most situations once you actively look for them.

This article on core beliefs is useful : https://www.betterup.com/blog/core-beliefs

And this on the reticular activating system : https://medium.com/desk-of-van-schneider/if-you-want-it-you-might-get-it-the-reticular-activating-system-explained-761b6ac14e53

Rebuilding confidence takes time, but small steps can make a big difference. Start by setting small, achievable goals and celebrating each success. Therapy can be really helpful, offering tools to reframe negative thoughts. Surround yourself with supportive people who lift you up.

For me - I’d add to your excellent list: lots of fresh air, forcing myself to see friends and be “out in the world” helps me to regain a sense of proportion.

Thank you for sharing the articles, I'll definitely go through them.

Thank you for your advice! I'll try to follow it.

I've found therapy really helpful for all sorts of reasons.
Do you need to process/ fully come to terms with everything that happened last year ( mine was shit too- kind of, "if I'd read it in a book I'd have thought it would be too far fetched" shit). It can be tempting to want to just bury stuff and move on but sometimes if you try and do that it can kind of gaunt you from below the surface.

I think therapy can help you full deal with the past and work out how to move on into the future.

Also - take a break from reality. I like to read a book or play piano or potter in my garden. You have to just float away sometimes before you can face coming back

Oh yeah, I'll definitely add morning walk in my routine. Thank you!

Best steps might depend on what are of your life

If it's work you can review some training and reassure yourself your skills are solid, maybe upskill, find a kind mentor, ask for work you find easy for a while.

If it's relationships then talking to significant others or a therapist. Figuring out what went wrong and what learning you can take from it.

If it's anxiety about daily life counselling and small achieveable steps, etc..

Also avoid living your life online and if you find you are tending towards addictive traits or escapism in social media or short form videos limit yourself and do something real. It does not take long to reset your mind.

That's a good piece of advice, thank you!