Struggling to get private therapy

[gentlemum]

I’m looking for private face to face therapy, specifically looking at psychotherapy, but therapists seem to either never respond or if they do they’re fully booked. Or the details they have online aren’t correct, like they don’t actually work face to face or in the evenings. I’m sure I’d have more chance finding someone for online therapy but I just don’t like the disconnect with online appointments. I’ve had online counselling before and really didn’t like it. It’s a lot to research and find someone I think would be good, reach out to them, only to be told no or they don’t respond. Why don’t these therapists update their online profile to say they’re fully booked?! I’m getting more despondent about it all and feeling hopeless.

Has anyone else found these difficulties? Should I keep persevering? Do these therapists ever actually take on new clients or just have the same ones for years?!

That’s frustrating. Where are you looking?

I’d keep persevering. I agree demand is high and it can feel a huge exhausting job just to get into the room with someone - and you don’t even know they’re the right person yet. But the potential payoff is so great that it’s worth it.

I prioritised group practices on the principle they’d be a bit more reliable to contact?

I’m looking at the UKCP website and searching by my local area. Starting to exhaust the options there! If I don’t get the right feel from the person’s profile I haven’t been contacting them, maybe I’m being too selective..

I had no idea it was so hard! I waited on someone’s waiting list for four months and they’ve now stopped working so that was a waste of time and I had no idea how difficult this process would be. I don’t just want to go with anyone who is available if they’re not the right person. I’m not in a position to spend hundreds on therapy and then it not be successful and go and start again with someone else.

Hello,
I'm sorry it's been so hard.
Try the BACP Directory, Psychology Today, Welldoing.org
Like the other poster said, group practices will more likely accommodate face to face.
Best of luck

Try Counselling Directory, you can search by area plus on the top right of the profile it says whether they’re taking on new clients and you can filter by face to face 😊

Roughly where in the UK are you? Most CONTROL practitioners can work face to face and offer a free initial consultation.

I would use one of the popular platforms to search - such as Counselling Directory. As a poster said above, you can filter by area, medium etc. Most practitioners will put evidence of professional registration on their profile (and CD does cross check as a barrier to entry).

It''s also absolutely fine to contact someone and ask for professional reg number before going further. You can check this directly with the organisation they're registered with.

This isn’t an option unless you are filthy rich but the lead times for therapy at The Priory are not too long. Probably because it costs £150 per session if selffunding 😭

I am a UKCP private therapist. The UKCP directory is sadly quite hard to use, so it’s difficult to keep up to date. And some therapists did online only in Covid. Renting a room is really expensive, so it’s tempting to offer online only.
If you look at counselling directory, you can filter by UKCP members.
I am very busy, and as there are far fewer UKCP therapists than others, we do tend to be quite booked up. It’s no excuse not to reply to you though. Also, if you don’t live near a city where UKCP training is offered, it’s harder to find someone. I had the same problem myself when looking.
There will be someone for you. If you let me know where you are looking, I might be able to give you some pointers.

Thanks all! I’ve looked at some other directories to branch out and sent a few more messages in the hope I hear back.

@EyesopenwideawakeI’ve looked up about the CONTROL practitioners and it looks really interesting! Do you have personal experience of it?

@therapist78thank you for your insight on it. I’m in south east England, I’ve been looking on BACP, UKCP, and counselling directory. I’m getting a bit confused by all the different terminology and people say they use a psychodynamic counselling approach but their training doesn’t list anything about psychodynamic therapy?

@gentlemum I am a CONTROL practitioner! I do offer face to face sessions but only if you're here in central Portugal 😊

Do NOT do pseudotherapy recommended by a sranger online. Also counselling directory and BACP both list people who arent properly trained (saying this here usually flushes them out to fight) UKCP and BPC (psychoanalytic council) only list fully trained psychotherapists, so just perservere there.

If people are full, but they seem good, ask about their waiting list.

@gentlemumif their training is integrative, they will likely have some psychodynamic training as part of that. If you are looking at lists of extra training, some people list their CPD, and that is really unlikely to be psychodynamic training, as that’s usually covered in core training. I’m not sure if that helps. I am happy to answer more specific questions if that helps.

Thank you, yes that helps. I wasn’t sure if the more generic looking counselling qualifications covered psychodynamic too. It’s such a lot of money so I’m very anxious about choosing the right person

If you see qualifications like ‘therapeutic counselling’ it likely won’t have included psychodynamic, but integrative or pluralistic post graduate diplomas will likely have done. You can always ask. Therapists should be happy to answer questions about their training.
good luck in your search.

https://www.finder.bupa.co.uk this is useful.

I would be very surprised if any fully trained psychotherapists work in the evening, it’s a proper profession and therefore they will be working during normal clinical hours. The two I know get fed up with prospective clients expecting them to want to work evenings, it’s just a no from them

I know some fully qualified therapists who work in the evening, but not loads.

There is less demand for face-to-face these days (since Covid) so most therapists will offer less face-to-face slots (days) because so many clients prefer online. It’s not financially viable to pay for premises for face-to-face when there isn’t the demand.

As per a previous poster, evening appointments are also uncommon. So if you want face-to-face and in the evening, you’re starting to look for a bit of a unicorn.

For psychodynamic/psychoanalytic try BPC or UKCP. There are some psychodynamic therapists on BACP if they've done the masters not the doctorate level training.

Any therapist at masters level or above in any of the voluntary organisations - bpc, bacp etc should have done plenty of personal therapy themselves and plenty of training.

Personally if I was going for psychodynamic therapy I would look at the BPC but that's just me.

That said there are some excellent therapists who are none of the above they're just excellent therapists. It's really hard!

I would love if that were true, but I know far too many people, even at doctoral level, who have no personal therapy experience, and who deliver psychodynamic therapy, but with only a six-week course on Freud.

Asking, "how many hours of personal therapy have you had?" is a good question to ask a prospective therapist; you want a number over 300 hours at least... closer to 600 is better.

I do agree, BPC is the place to start, though.

If they are UKCP or BCP therapists, they will have had to have therapy throughout training. That isn't true of BACP therapists, regardless of the level of qualification, although some will have chosen to do their own work anyway.

I agree. I would argue it's not really psychodynamic therapy if there hasn't been substantial psychodynamic training and substantial, as you say, personal therapy.

IME, Counselling Directory is better for filters and finding people. The person is also more important than the modality or qualifications.

I ended up seeing the most recently qualified person on my list, with the modality I least preferred, simply because he was available and affordable and I was about 2 minor inconveniences from jumping onto a railway line.

He has honestly been the best choice I could have made. My life has changed beyond recognition. It wasn't smooth sailing. There were plenty of misunderstandings, ruptures and conflicts. We had a good old jab of each others buttons. But I was determined to change, he was determined to stick it out with me and we got there.

It's more important that you're willing to do the hard work and your therapist is willing to do it with you. I wouldn't get too hung up on what kind of therapy it is.