This anxiety is never going away

[Shinyshiny2]

I get massive sleep anxiety which rears its head every few years. I worry I won’t sleep which in turn stops me sleeping then it’s a viscious circle! I know that I need to just not worry but that’s easier said then done. Every time this has happened previously I’ve been signed off of work with bad anxiety and taken fluoxetine and it’s gradually got better. I’m in a state again on day 12 of fluoxetine and really really don’t want to be signed off work but I’m so anxious that I won’t sleep tonight then won’t cope tomorrow (I’m a teacher). I feel so hopeless and trapped by this anxiety I’m so scared it’s here to stay this time and nothing will work!

fluoxetine

You have been prescribed a pretty hefty AD for temporary sleep disturbance?

Have you tried going to bed every night, the same time as your dcs, or at 8pm, whichever is earlier. Have a warm, milky, sleep inducing drink. Read in bed until you fall asleep. Don't worry about switching off the light.

That way, you should get at least 8 hours sleep, always be awake in time for work, and never oversleep.

When your anxiety starts to recede you can ease the time forward a bit.

Early morning exercise might help as well. Dog walk?

Do you have a good sleep routine and take magnesium glycinate? I take an antihistamine if I need to sleep.
Im assuming there’s more to this I’d you’re on AD’s for it?

My problem isn’t sleep as I sleep well when I’m not worried. My problem is anxiety - so I get the thought in my head ‘imagine if you stay awake all night’ then it’s self fulfilling. I know that I can sleep if I just relax but I can’t turn the worry off and it escalates into massive anxiety, panic attacks etc ruminating all day. I’m so worried that I’m stuck like this forever and the fluoxetine won’t work on the anxiety.

Can I ask why they take you off the AD’s? My DH has been on them for over 20 years for anxiety, he was told to never come off them.

Are you not sleeping.at all? Or a few hours?

why fluoxetine rather than something like zopiclone for a short while to reset - did the doctor say?

or yes an antihistamine like promethazine?

I have had this for years, it’s grim when it gets going.
Have you tried an audio book? I have 6 or 7 that I cycle through, I know them almost off by heart, very comforting, no surprises. I wear a single earpiece and the books are just enough to dull my thoughts until I drift off?
Alternatively I play alphabets in my head.. think of an animal beginning with A, now B, now C etc.
Again simple things.. dogs, girls names, etc. Last night I did people I love. Nothing complicated and if you can’t think of one letter immediately move to the next. Just keeps the brain off the anxiety and I don’t often play more than one round.
Anyway, good luck, it does get better as life simplifies; get lots of exercise in the fresh air if you can and avoid alcohol unless it’s a special occasion.

Ah sorry cross posted. Have you been offered CBT. I’m not the worlds hugest fan of the NHS approach of CBT for everything, but this sounds like a situation where it could work really well. Better than antidepressants without the side effects.

What about facing it? When I’m feeling really worried by something I just make a plan for it happening, this in itself helps distract from the worry. So when you hear the ‘what if you’re awake all night’ embrace it and plan all the things you’ll get done in the time, (include reading a book as that always gets me back to sleep at 2pm). I think playing mental gymnastics might help, and then if you’re lying in bed at 11pm not able to drift off think ´silly le’ I’m meant to be reading now!

Do you think it’s possible to go to work sleepless and anxious? I’m so scared of being signed off as then I sit at home with my thoughts all day! I have been offered CBT which I’m going but not finding it very helpful yet. Will the fluoxetine kick in? It worked before but I’m so scared I’m broken forever. It feels like I’m stuck like this and will never enjoy my lovely life again. Going to bed is like going to battle - I’m riddled with adrenaline and anxiety I do lots of grounding exercises but nothing helps.

Are you alone op?

No I’m with my husband and kids.

Do you share a bed with him? Have you considered trying to sleep alone?

What did you do yesterday? Exercised? Fresh air?

You are not operating heavy machinery or flying a plane so you would actually survive if you didn't get any sleep. Maybe just need to be extra careful on the drive in.

Have you tried magnesium?

Unfortunately the problem is your reaction to the thought of "what I don't sleep tonight?" You react with (even internally, your amygdala is picking it up) with "oh my god that would be absolutely awful, I'll feel XYZ tomorrow, it will continue on to the next night, I'll never sleep properly again". If you fix your reaction to the initial intrusive thought this will go away much quicker. Even if you don't believe it at the start, FAKE IT til you make it. So when the thought comes what if I don't sleep tonight - respond to yourself with "okay great!! I can get my whole book read, I can catch up on that TV show I love, I can find a new podcast I might like, the possibilities are endless this is gonna be great!!"

Doing that ONCE won't override this, your reaction to the intrusive thought needs to be consistent and in the evening do exactly what you've told it you'll do, don't lie there internally screaming in the darkness tossing and turning, do the tasks you've told "it" that will be great to do. If the "I'm gonna be so tired at work tomorrow" creeps in tell yourself "yeah but I'll have completed that book so it won't matter!". The more doom responses you give it the more it perpetuates.

If I do that and do end up reading my book or watching tv all night and still don’t sleep will I eventually sleep? Will that help the anxiety? I just want to be able to go to work and enjoy my life again x

Op you are getting yourself in a twist

have a shower
get everyone up and out the house for a good long walk
have lunch out
have a full lovely day

You will either doze off later or if you don't you'll have one very tired day and probably conk out the next night IF you continue the safe reactions to the intrusive thoughts. Basically your current reaction to the thought is telling your amygdala that this is something that it needs to be riled up about so it's going to continue to do so until you break the loop with consistently showing it that not sleeping is not something to be frightened of. X

My DS is like this and has been since lockdown. He says it helps him if he convinces himself (in the moment) it doesn’t matter if he sleeps or not. He knows all about sleep hygiene but it sort of puts more pressure on him to sleep as he’s doing all the right things. Hr also finds white noise helpful.

He’s in his final year of uni and is struggling atm. He’s getting a lot of help for his MH (anxiety/oCD traits) but needs an SSRI really as the therapy etc is just not enough (hrs not keen on medication- he had one go at an SSRI but it didn’t work so didn’t bother trying another).

Ok but what if I didn’t sleep for nights on end?!

Op you aren’t helping yourself

get off mumsnet
have a shower
get a load of fresh air and movement today
go out for lunch with your family
mix up your routine

Thank you. The anxiety is just extreme! Will this pass and will I eventually sleep?

Op please follow my suggestion and take it a day at a time