Learning to Be Okay with Doing Nothing

[USleepDeprived]

I’ve started noticing how uncomfortable I get when I’m not being “productive.” Even on weekends, I’ll find myself tidying something, checking emails, or feeling guilty for just sitting on the sofa doing nothing. It’s like somewhere along the way, rest turned into something that needed to be earned instead of something we all just deserve. Lately, I’ve been trying to unlearn that — to let myself enjoy lazy mornings, slow coffee, quiet walks with no destination. Sometimes I’ll leave my phone in another room and just stare out the window for ten minutes. It sounds silly, but it feels strangely grounding. Doing nothing isn’t actually doing nothing — it’s recharging, processing, and letting your brain breathe. I’m slowly learning that the world won’t fall apart if I pause for a bit. Do any of you struggle with this too? How do you remind yourself that rest is also part of living?

We are often encouraged from an early age to be busy, to be productive, to be 'doing something' at all times. Many people link it to their self worth, their reason for living.

Doing nothing is something that most people reserve for holidays or recovering from ill health but you're 100% right – learning how to deliberately do nothing is a skill we should all develop. (And yes, I struggle too, but I'm getting there!).

I struggle with this. The product of a mum who never sat down!

I have been know to put “have a bloody rest” on my to-do list. I’m not good at doing it spontaneously but if it’s “planned downtime” then I can.

I’m so glad you posted. I feel this too. I feel guilty if I’m not busy. But I know I need to give myself more brain space.

I think this is less to do with 'doing nothing' or 'not being productive' than it is to do with being present, rather than distracted by SM, or a task. And yes, definitely, being present can be difficult and need practice if you're not used to it.

Absolutely relate to this. I think a lot of us have been conditioned to equate our worth with how much we produce, so slowing down can feel almost “wrong.” What’s helped me is reframing rest as something active — like I’m intentionally giving my mind and body what they need to function well. I also remind myself that some of my best ideas or moments of clarity happen when I’m not doing anything “productive.” Rest isn’t a reward for hard work; it’s part of the cycle that makes good work — and good living — possible.

My mum never stopped. I didn't inherit the gene and my best days (and the ones I look forward to the most) are my do nothing days.
That's where it ends. Days of nothing for me are few and far between. It seems the gene skipped a generation and (unfortunately for me) my DD is my mother reincarnated. She has me booked up months ahead. There really is no escape!

Yes I struggled with this too so what I do now is I make a to-do list of relaxing (it tricks my brain into thinking I'm being "productive" but with self care) so it will look like this - 1) watch new episodes of TV show 2) put on a face mask, 3) meditate, 4) read a chapter of book, 5) have a bubble bath etc so because I'm ticking things off it feels like I'm completing something.

I have struggled with this , yes.

Even when walking, I feel like I have to be listening to something , but why ? peace allows daydreaming / mental switch off which is SO important !

It requires practice - I too leave my phone in another room and I have come off all social media (mental health reasons in general)