When you feel that they would be better off without you

[Happyface82]

Just this. 4 kids. Youngest is 8 months. Have help at home as I work a lot but still I feel like Im drowning. I don't think I can do it all. Feeling really upset right now and sort of feel like everyone would be better off without. No thoughts of self harming. Just to make it clear. Just feel helpless right now. Needed to get it off my chest.

Are you back working with an 8 month old? Or do you mean the work of having 4 kids?!
You can't really believe those 4 wee bairns would have better lives without their mum?
Have you seen your GP about how you're feeling?

I started working at 4 months as I run my own company. Was working from home a lot but now go to work every day. I tried talking to my husband numerous times. He seems to think its absolutely normal as there is so much on my plate. Im confused.

Well is suspect that it is fairly normal when you’re dealing with 4 small children and a business.
BUT what does he do to help? Is he pulling his weight?

He does a lot. He works a lot too and is away with work sometimes but he does help. He is very good. No complains there. I just feel that everything is too much. That I can't cope. I don't see it getting better. It's very stressful. I just want to feel calm again. On top of things. Not sure how to achieve this.

Can you take a step back from your business? Your priority is you and then your kids, you are their world.

Maybe it sounds selfish but its super difficult to take a step back from the business. Also, I always feel better when Im working.

Your children will never be better off without you, you are their Mum, they will be traumatised for the rest of their lives if you leave them.

If it’s all getting too much, give up your business. You can start a new one in the future when circumstances are better. If you need the money, get a “normal” job.

With regards to your DP/DH, maybe you will be better off apart, maybe you will be better off together - you need to think about what you would prefer going forward.

Whatever you decide about your DP/DH and your job, don’t leave your children.

Where are you located? I’d highly recommend The Listening Place for just talking through these feelings if you’re London based. Maybe others can weigh in on similar services elsewhere if that doesn’t work for you.

No job is more important than your children. Are you perhaps using it as an excuse to avoid your children. They deserve better and you can do it.