Scared to let toddler sleep in her own room.

[emsantana99]

Please no judgement here I want proper advice.

My daughter just turned 2 and we’ve just finished doing up her whole room, she sleeps in her own bed but at night I keep going and getting in it with her.

Bit of a back story, she’d always slept in her own cot ect, then when she was 11 months old I had to go and stay with a friend while I was waiting for my house to be done, in that time we shared a double bed, and ever since then I’ve been really terrified to put her in her own room, I’m so afraid that she’s going to get kidnapped or something ( I know it’s so neurotic, I think it’s more needing professional help ). I put her to bed @ night, and she settles perfectly fine, and will sleep on her own. IM THE PROBLEM:( I know what I’m doing isn’t good at all, but when I get into my own bed I literally CANNOT sleep, I will be awake until the early hours of the morning tossing and turning, continuously checking the baby monitor - I’m fine when she goes and sleeps @ my mums / uncles house ect, but when she’s with me I just can’t fall asleep unless I’m in the same room as her! Please someone advise me on how I can stop myself from feeling like this because I know it’s not good for my daughter nor myself.

thanks guys

I would seek therapy as soon as possible, (I know the wait times are long though)you don't want to transfer your anxiety onto your daughter.

There's a bit of your subconscious mind that's developed that erroneous belief (maybe you didn't feel safe at your friend's house?) but anything the mind can learn it can unlearn – and generally speaking the 'newer' a unreasonable fear is the easier it is to remove. A short course of hypnotherapy or remedial hypnosis should deal with it.

You need to stop this and get help so unfair to transfer something you have a problem with onto your child. Stop it right away and go downstairs anything but share. Not the way to bring up a little one if there secure and happy anyhow

This sounds really hard OP. I do recommend therapy.

I don’t stay upstairs in bed with her. I put her to bed and then go downstairs until I want to go to bed, Im not sure if you fully read the post, I leave her in her own bed until about 2 AM and then I go I. Her bedroom, I know it’s wrong, but just telling me to stop it isn’t helpful at all. I’m not transferring anything onto my daughter as I do not express my fear and she is asleep when I go into her bedroom.

I think it’s the favt that for a little hike before staying with my friend I had to stay in an B&m that was absolutely awful! I deffo need some professional help, thank you for your response I appreciate it

It is super hard, especially when I know that I am going to end up undoing my daughters bedtime routine and I really don’t want to do that, I appreciate your response thank you!