I need to finally get help but side affects have always scared me

[funinthesun19]

I suffer a lot with anxiety and it’s controlling and ruining my life. I lose so much sleep because of it and I can’t cope anymore.
I’ve always stopped myself from seeking help medically because I’ve always been so scared of the side effects. I have it in my head that my sight will be affected as I read somewhere anti depressants can cause sight problems in some people. So my mental health even stops me from getting the help that I desperately need.

I’ve tried talking therapies and they don’t work. Sometimes you’re so exhausted mentally that trying to get better by thinking positive/more rationally just doesn’t work without the help of medication.

I need some encouragement and reassurance that I’m going to be ok starting the medical route. Some days I feel like it would be peaceful to just go to sleep and never wake up and then I will be free from myself.

Why don’t you agree with yourself to a six month trial? Write a symptom diary before you start, and during the six months, so you can see if it’s helping or not. I had anxiety over starting HRT and did exactly that, and then never came off it.
I understand about your reluctance to try AD’s, unfortunately it’s one of the symptoms of the problem, but they really will help. My DH wouldn’t be here now without them.