Suspected ADHD in 21 YO son, how to get private assessment?

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Hi, I've been worried over the last few years that my son may have ADHD as he seems to have found the last few years much more difficult than his brother did at the same age.

School was never difficult for him until sixth form; he achieved all 8’s and 9’s at GCSE and was predicted A/A at A-level but ended up with A A and D because he could not manage to settle down to study for his third subject. He resat this subject and managed to improve the grade to a high C which got him a place on his chosen university course at which point I thought he would be fine but the struggles have continued.

His first year was characterised by leaving coursework until the last minute and then pulling all nighters to meet the deadlines. I have just found out that he had to resubmit a piece of coursework earlier this week to pass his second year; he again left this until the night before to begin.

It’s not just coursework deadlines he has a problem with; we had to pay a premium for his first year accommodation in private halls because he failed to submit the form for university halls in which he would have been guaranteed a place. He’s also extremely prone to losing his phone, keys and wallet, much more frequently than is typical even for young adults I think. Does this sound like ADHD?

I know the pace is really going to ramp up in the third year of his degree so I would like to get him a private assessment for some coping strategies and medication if he meets the criteria but have no idea where to start. Could anybody direct me to a website or similar resource where I could obtain a list of reputable psychiatrists for assessing ADHD please? Also, I have no idea what I might pay for an assessment and prescription, presumably the sky is the limit so it would be extremely helpful if anyone else has been through this to know approximately how much would be reasonable.

I went private for my DD at 15. Best thing I ever did. I used ADHD360 and it was 4 days between me paying the money and getting a diagnosis. Sure was on medication within a week and it’s changed her life.

Thanks @GreenGodiva approximately how much did it cost for the diagnosis and prescription?

I’d be very wary about private clinics. See here
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-65534448.amp

Google private ADHD assessments in your area / online, and choose one that follows the NICE guidelines i.e. offers 2 separate assessment appointments, one with a psychologist and one with a psychiatrist. Also check beforehand if your NHS GP will do shared care re prescribing medication, if your son is interested in trying medication, as it isn’t cheap.

Yes does sound like it could be ADHD, but could also be a combo of any of the following: dyslexia/dyspraxia/autism/could also be that A Levels weren’t really what he wanted to be doing….it could just be one of those things. Be prepared that an assessment may not result in a diagnosis.

Check out SEIK Psychiatry online. Their prices are on their website. They’re really good.

Thanks @Limonades, ideally I would like to pay privately to access the same consultants that I would see through the NHS but just faster as otherwise I'm worried my son won't cope with his third year of university. He just seems to find certain things much harder than his peers with similar academic ability.

Get your Ds to ask his GP for referral via the right to choose pathway https://www.nhs.uk/using-the-nhs/about-the-nhs/your-choices-in-the-nhs/.

My daughter’s diagnosis was £700 and a year off after care was £600 I think? Then £60-70 a month for medication. Luckily CAMHS took over when she was stable but it really was life changing for her. Sure went from failing every single mock exam and refusing school, but then passed all of her GCSEs and is now doing an engineering Tlevel. I’m very proud of the way she turned things around but the treatment of the ADHD has revealed a whole load of autism that I had no idea about. She was exceptionally good at masking but now is totally Unable to and her moods are very much on the surface these days.

Thanks @MrsEmmelinePankhurst I don't think it's dyslexia as he was always above average at reading and spelling, nor dyspraxia as he has competed at a regional level in a couple of sports and learned to swim and ride a bike very early. But I guess it may present differently in different individuals. I don't want him to take medication if he doesn't meet the criteria, just some coping strategies would be helpful and also for him to feel listened to because he currently feels he's failing.

I'm in a similar position with my 8 year old daughter, luckily I had a health visitor come for my 12 month old and she noticed how she is and made a comment about her being assessed and has pointed me I'm the right direction so hopefully we can get her seen to because she has got a lot worse in the last couple of years and I'm hoping we can treat it, I'm not sure what can be done for an older person though unless you look into private diagnoses? I've been referred for an assessment myself from a psychologist and she said the waiting times is years and years so I'm not holding out much hope for me but hoping my daughter will get seen.

@CandidRaven I hope you can get some help for your daughter! My son never had any problems flagged up in his early years so I'm lucky that I never had to fight to get him extra help at school. He has never had a problem with hyperactivity so I guess it would be the inattentive form of ADHD that we're querying. I know that I'm also very lucky that now my older son is financially independent I can afford to go privately for an initial assessment for DS2 as I certainly couldn't have afforded this a few years ago as a single parent!

Psychiatry UK or ADHD 360. The wait times are long even privately. People are waiting up to a year for titration on meds.

Regardless of meds he needs strategies. ADHD UK has some useful online workshops on its website. Lots of books on Amazon with strategies. I personally found Smart But Scattered Guide for Adults very good.

Some strategies I have learned (inattentive ADHD) :

Using body doubling eg. Focus Mate. Active noise cancelling headphones. Get a coach.

Avoid negative people. Don't rush - wait half an hour and decide. Decide if you like being around crazy people or calm people - makes a big difference.

Mindset of learning from mistakes not berating yourself. Ask questions when you're not sure. If you suspect something might be a challenge - think ahead.

Use a planning template for starting a new project. Having notice boards / white boards - have a look at kan ban.

Positive self talk - people with ND encounter negative feedback. I have a book of positive quotes and quotes on my walls, framed photos. Ask 'what went well today'. Avoid energy drainers.

Have a children's timer off Amazon for procrastination.

Some kind of task management system- doesn't matter what - One Note, Planner, pen and paper - pick one and stick to it. Make sure you cannot lose your organising system- if it's on your phone, make sure you can't lose your phone - there's enough tech in existence to make your phone findable. Likewise if the issue is passwords then find one system. Pomodoro technique - 25 min bursts of organising/tidying.

Have a TILE on everything. I have them on all my keys, workpass and wallet. I don't lose them these days but I mislay them around home constantly. I have an Alexa in every room.

Make lists for everything and save them onto Google Drive etc. - every time you do something new create a list of how you did it so you can go back to it for next time.

My absolute worst trait is time management, I have no awareness - best solution is to have a daily sequence of events. Do this then this then this. Have a bucket of time for x. Know when you work well and not.

Honestly these are small things but they help a lot.

Some kind of phone blocking software app maybe useful. A mediterranean diet has been shown to have some benefit for people with ADHD. Many people use caffeine, lions mane.

@GreenZebraStripes Thanks, some very helpful tips, I will pass them on to DS.

Although his diet is OK in terms of eating mainly unprocessed food he seems to be drinking far too much caffeine in the form of strong coffees and Monster drinks to pull all nighters and then he's requiring melatonin the next day to reset his body clock and help him sleep. He seems to pick up every bug that's going round suggesting that he's a bit rundown so I don't think this is a good longterm strategy!

I recall pulling an all nighter with 7 cans of Red Bull - then was in agony with stomach ache and burst into tears trying to get served in the student union bar on hand-in day 😂 That taught me a lesson!

Hey everyone,
Just coming back to update on what the outcome was for my son. We contacted SEIK Psychiatry and after a few false starts (my son didn't read the information they sent properly and failed to submit the required questionnaires in time for the first set of appointments so they had to be rescheduled) he has had the 2 assessments by psychologist and psychiatrist and apparently they both felt he met the criteria for ADHD diagnosis.

I sat in on part of the assessment as an observer and found out that my son was struggling far more than I realised so I am very glad that we sought help before his final year of university. My son is very happy with the diagnosis as he feels that he finally has an explanation for his difficulties and that he's not a failure. Thanks so much to everyone for your advice.

In fairness this was such a biased and terrible documentary (and quite possibly Panoramas most complained about programme) that it was at one point removed from iPlayer.

Also it covered private companies not right to choose. And if you really look into it, to even get a referral you do have to meet the screening criteria. Which means one of 2 things either Rory actually lied about his medical history or he actually did have traits of ADHD.

Plus it was in no way.l a fair experiment. You cannot test 3 companies blindly but then be open with then NHS about the documentary, that was very clearly biased. Also he didn't portray a realistic experience of NHS ADHD diagnosis, he literally got seen immediately because he informed them he was was doing a documentary . So even from the off just based on that you cannot fairly compare private Vs NHS.

As an aside to that it was investigating private referalls NOT NHS referrals. I do concede that at the time of said documentary ADHD360 which were featured at that time did not have a consultant psychiatrist on team, not that it technically matters as ADHD can be diagnosed by a variety of specialists, and they to my current my knowledge have now resolved that issue

The NHS Right To Choose pathway was set up in England to mitigate and lessen the ridiculous waiting list for assessment and treatment (important to note that's for EVERYTHING NOT JUST ADHD!!!!). if your waiting time is more than 18 weeks by law in England you have the legal right to choose

The NHS commissions the private companies to carry out NHS assessments on their behalf subject to the same NICE criteria the NHS have to use. Also here is a fun fact, certain areas of ENGLAND NHS sevices do not even have a dedicated neurodiversity service....I know of one area where Psychiatry UK were literally what was used AS the NHS pathway as they didn't have their own

Most adults cannot even be reffered for an assessment unless their GP who does the referral has actual reasonable belief that the person meets the criteria for ADHD.

The psychiatrist who diagnosed me under the RTC pathway is also actually an NHS CONSULTANT PSYCHIATRIST...so if you want to tell me his opinion is not valid due to it being right to choose equally you should be doubting his capacity to diagnose via the NHS (which most wouldn't)

My biggest bugbear of this documentary (aside from the fact as someone who's worked and studied documentary film it was fucking awful) is the very clear bias and the devastating real world affect its had one those living with ADHD. A large number of GPs beloved this to such an extent that the majority have banned or even revoked existing shared care agreements based on nothing but bias and hyperbole. It was incredibly damaging.

Oh and on topof all of that, the NHS psych that was actually the person in that very documentary himself came Ur sevela.days letter in a news article explaining that actually he DID NOT think it was being overdiagnosed but was actually still UNDIAGNOSED