I've just been reading about parentification and it's totally knocked me. I have normalised my childhood as it wasn't anything extreme in emotional or physical abuse. My Mum and Dad married very fast and young (Pregnancy) - not suited on any level. The earliest memory I have is Dad telling me that if I didn't behave they were going to divorce and another time my Mum driving away biting my dads hand so he couldn't get the keys. Now I recollect the environment I was always on edge trying to keep everyone happy. My Mum would use me as a confidante, always negatively about Dad, saying she didn't see him as her husband. However I still felt loved. This over spilled into my adult years, I developed into a people pleaser, putting my needs last and also seeing my husband in a negative light. Now my Mum has cancer and I'm torn with putting in boundaries and caring for her. It's hard to gage when is enough and when can I concentrate on me and my family. My Mum might die soon and I'm finding hard to not be angry with her.