Worrying and overthinking past events

[Anxiousgirl9619]

I'm quite an anxious person who has struggled with their mental health for years. I recently have had a really bad time with my mental health in the past month/months.

A moment I keep reliving is when I first started driving I made a trip 2 hours from home and didn't know the roads very well. The driving went great until I got to a weird road that had signs saying no entry and 2 other lanes going in the direction I was intending to go, so I automatically thought it was a one way due to the layout... It was not.

So I exited the road from the right hand lane (where oncoming traffic would enter the road) there were maybe 4 cars behind me but no cars turning in (thank god for that). As soon as I entered the lane I knew it wasn't right as no other cars followed but safely got out and made it home unscathed.

Though this moment haunts me every so often and it makes me feel extremely anxious and annoyed at myself for doing it.

Do you have any horror stories from driving? Or have you ever done something similar and kicked yourself afterwards?

Any tips on getting past these moments and reliving them? I've never done anything as stupid since as I've learnt from it.

Thanks

I used to have a phobia about turning right in my car at lights, when there is a left lane with other cars in it.
I can only describe it as feeling trapped and claustrophobic.
Horror story? Happened to me once on a very busy road, at a busy time after I had visited a friend who lived on the same road.
I absolutely froze when the lights turned green. And I mean didn’t move. Traffic was turning left, but the cars behind me were stuck.
People were beeping, some were driving on to my right into oncoming traffic. At a panic moment I did a U turn (everyone got out alive) drove my car to my friend’s, and she had to take me home.
My car was outside her house for weeks as I wouldn’t get in it.
I joined a counselling course a few weeks after, ended up just 4 students and the teacher. We had to ‘practice’ on each other a lot in pairs, and share with the group. So the above was my obvious story.
And I was Never Turn Right Peggy. Still friends with my counselling partner buddy many years after, and we still laugh at their horror story as well, and it was FAR worse than mine. And yours!
Talking with someone else, and then hearing three other stories was amazing. One of the others had been homeless for five years, now doing very well and had a job, but their story was harrowing. Made mine seem daft, but it’s all relative.
Find a space to share, as you have done here. Find a therapist to talk to, if you can. And know we all feel like this.
Then get out of your own head - find things to do which are more about action, than thought.

@PeggyMitchellsCameo thanks for sharing with me. It has made me feel not as alone, it can be really exhausting worrying over things you can't fix but it's really difficult to turn your mind from overthinking about it.
I might see if I can get some sort of counselling for it especially related to driving as it seems to be the main trigger for my anxiety.

If it makes you feel better it took me many years to pass my test and I drive alone as nobody will get in the car with me even now.
Apparently, it’s a white knuckle ride all the way!
I am not unintelligent, but put me on a road and I’m absolutely awful. Luckily, I don’t have to drive now, but if you need to as most people do, it’s time to get some help.
You aren’t actually scared of driving, that’s just the vehicle - pardon the pun - which is driving your anxiety.
If you are like me, you don’t like making mistakes, feel like you may get in trouble and make an idiot of yourself. Not one person apart from you will remember your driving incident.
I was able to access therapy for the driving incident and a few other things around it. CBT-based stuff was actually really helpful.
I get far too much into my own head, and learning ways of getting out of it has also helped as well. Even if it’s just getting up and moving, dancing, going for a walk, even doing a boring task like emptying a drawer and cleaning and tidying, it’s helped.
It is more common than you think, honestly, you are not alone with this.

@PeggyMitchellsCameo did your driving incidents impact you for hours/days? Mine would sometimes be like that, moreso hours than anything longer and then I'd realise I was worrying about stuff I can't fix.

I sometimes feel like I'm alone as my friends and family just tell me to get over it as no harm done but I hate making mistakes and potentially causing harm (even if no one was around I always think "what if?")

OP you are not alone in this. I am always over thinking past events, especially driving. Cyclists scare me to the point that I have even changed route if I see them ahead of me. Never had an incident but I have even retraced my steps as I've been convinced I may have been too close and caused them to wobble....I had in reality given them and myself plenty of room.
I can't talk to my partner as he is a very confident (assertive/aggressive) driver who has a running commentary about how stupid other drivers are. I sit there quietly thinking that I am exactly the driver he hates, but he's more than happy for me to be the designated driver on a night out!!! I even say out loud that the traffic light is green as I go though so I don't panic that I didn't notice a red! It isn't always helpful to say it was fine no harm done but perhaps forgive yourself and say lesson learnt.
I have considered paying for a one off driving lesson just as a refresher and to prove I am actually a better driver than I feel!

Well that really awful one did as I wouldn’t get into the car! Mine have been more about having panic attacks in the car, and yes, there has been an aftermath.
Other things which have upset me more perhaps have had a lasting impact, I think when you are really anxious you try and make sense of it so you protect yourself from future harm.
And you can’t do that. All you can do is live in the world as it is.
I found some of the resources from The Speakmans helped me a lot - they do get a lot of stick, but a found some of their videos really explained a lot of basics to me.