Religious and Spiritual Trauma Support Thread UK

[SeekingSolidarity]

I feel a bit nervous about this. So I’d be grateful for gentleness in this space, for me and anyone else that chooses to take part.

I am trying to do some work on myself, and take care of myself. I grew up in the Baptist Church, attending each week, and going to camps, Spring Harvest, etc.

I feel a real urge to connect with others that also experienced such spaces. Perhaps you enjoyed them at points, maybe even I did. But overall, it has left me an adult who looks back and thinks, ‘wow, that was so inappropriate!’ and realising that as a child I was, at best, being spiritually violated at times.

My memories include, encouragement to speak tongues, long, extended highly emotive worship periods, deep and psychological ‘exercises’ such as writing my sins on a rock and placing them at the foot of a cross, not being listened to when I felt other children or adults were unfair or unkind to me, emphasis on virginity and sexual purity.

I feel that some my difficulties as an adult, act as taking care of myself, prioritising my own needs, trusting myself and not making everything into a ‘do or die’ ‘death or salvation’ dilemma come from these early experiences.

My intention is to create a space for sharing and connecting, if it’s helpful to others. I have found it difficult to find a space like this for people from the UK (lots in the US however!). Please join in only if it feels helpful and safe for you. Thank you

Isn't not being listened to a large part of many childhoods TBF.

I had a very dedicated, church based upbringing. 'Holiday camps' and kids are to be seen and not heard attitudes etc... Sundays and school holidays were not ours to use as we pleased.

Not as strict and culty sounding as your though. I can imagine it would be hard to break the indorcrinated personality traits.

I too had learned codependency. It's gone now though as tbh it was largely mimicing plus, having the wrong people around me. I feel my church was very much 'everyone is good, be kind to everyone' which is arguably better than a judge everyone mandate but... skewed me towards naivity and codependent practices. Thinking you could win people over with kindness etc ..and if they were nasty you had to try harder.

I feel healed now. But I do resent the childhood spent in these things as wasted youth. And how the church also monopolised much of my mother's time. My childhood was lonely and I didn't fit in those places.

I actually would want my kids to have a Christian upbringing/one where we talk about god lots. I just wouldn't go about it in the same way mine was.

I think things like these happen for a reason though, everything in life is a lesson in its own way.

I dont think about my childhood much. Life is too short to dwell on bad times :)