13 year old daughter took an overdose

[Zombieof3]

Hi all,

I’ve just spent the last 24 hours in hospital with my thirteen year old who had taken an overdose on my antidepressants. She didn’t even tell me and I found out two days after the fact. I took her straight to an and e whixh triggered a referral to social services which has caused me massive anxiety, however, I will do anything to help her get better. I don’t know what I’ve done so wrong, I’ve always tried to make her feel heard and that I’m always here for her but she will not open up to me. I’ve begged for her to open up. The biggest trigger is school, it causes her massive anxiety and she will try anything to get out of school. I’m absolutely petrified that she’s going to do something and I will find her dead. I’ve had to keep going to the toilet to cry as I don’t want her to feel guilty for how I’m feeling but I feel like I’ve failed so massively. I have a long history of mental health concerns and I have tried everything to avoid this for my children and I failed. I’m absolutely broken

I’m so sorry to hear this. You haven’t done anything wrong and you haven’t failed her. Hopefully she can get some support now. It must be so heart breaking for you to see her suffering.
(I’ve attempted suicide several times in my life and I’m sure my mum feels the same).
sending you a big hug and your daughter too x

Thank you. I feel like I really have done something wrong, I’ve tried what feels like everything. I am hoping she gets the support she needs but I am terrified that they will think I’m a crap parent and remove her from me. I can’t imagine my life without her, she’s my eldest and is my whole world. I need to be better and I want to do everything as I’m so scared I will lose her.

sending you hugs and I hope you have support around you 💓 xxx

Im so sorry. My son took multiple overdoses as a teen and was in and out of hospital, it’s heartbreaking. Obviously lock all tablets away now. I would ask her school to refer to CAMHS but there’s a long waiting list.

Hi op, I've been in this boat, it sucks so big hugs.

I would hope that my dc's event was a cry for help rather than a true attempt to end life, however I will never know, but we were so so lucky it didn't work. It was a bundle of triggers, anxiety, scholl, a unknown at that point diagnosis of autism. There had already been self harm issues but this just ramped up, it was in Y10. Again, similar in that the attempt didnt work and we were notified by school Monday morning they were sat in pastoral where this had come to.light that the attempt had been made the previous evening.

The hospital were goid, we were discharged with a crisis referral - a crisis team.person came the next day and they put a referral in to a support centre - that took 11 months to cone through. We arranged private counselling but it didn't do any good.

There are lots of standard checks made by support services just to make sure ypu and your dc are safe, well and have support ir it can me arranged (unlikely to be any time soon though).

At the time they had the huge ikea cabin beds with desk and bookcaae underbeath - while I was at the hospital dh went home and took it apart so that on a night we could peer in and check in snd lay eyes in dc in the night.
Knives, scissors, pencil sharpeners etc all got tucked away, and school had regular check ins with them.

It's a rubbish time, just keep communication open with your dc and with family, friends and services so that there is support for you both.

@Zombieof3 how are you and your daughter doing now? You are not a failure and it’s not your fault. x

I’ve been where you are more than once and it is very frightening, especially the not finding out straightaway. On a practical note, move / lock away all the medicines, sharp knives, razors, anything with a blade like a pencil sharpener, belts , stuff like de -icer etc as it can be used to self-harm. The car boot is a good bet before getting a lockable box for medicines etc.

Keep an eye on phone usage - unfortunately, there are people who post on things like Tik Tok who competitively encourage suicide and self-harm and it fans the flames when a young person is in a bad place.

Getting referred to Social Services hopefully means you and your family getting the support they need. It is not something to be ashamed of. Charities like Young Minds and Papyrus have good helplines and it might help you to speak to them.

Finally, things can and do get better. 12-16 were very difficult years but things are so much better now and we have a lot more strategies for dealing with low mood and upsets in the family. All the best x

I’m so sorry that you have also experienced this and multiple times, I can’t imagine how heartbreaking that was for you. It’s a shame with the waiting lists, I’m looking at private counselling but we are already strapped for cash. I’ll have to pay it somehow

Thank you so much, these have been massively helpful. I’ve done a complete room check and have ripped apart everything and removed anything that I could find which may be dangerous.

thankfully we have been told the waiting list is six weeks, I think we’ve been incredibly lucky with the waiting times.

I’m so sorry that you have been through this. It’s so hard and I’m trying to manage. I’ve been so all over the place but trying my best to be as supportive as I can. I’ve spoken to the school and have asked for a meeting with wellbeing to deal with the main stressor as school was the biggest trigger.

thank you so much for all the support and advice, I’ve been looking at papyrus and it’s been amazing. She saw CAMHS today and been referred to counselling which we will be told it will be six weeks which is far better time frame than I originally imagined. I’m just absolutely terrified that I’m going to find her dead, the thought alone is enough to have me sobbing. She is my literal world, she made me a parent and into the person I am today. She is so wonderful and I wish she could see it, it’s breaking my heart.

i haven’t heard anything from social services which I assume is good news. I worry they will think I’m a failure because of this and remove all my children. I wouldn’t be alive without them.

@Zombieof3 my 12 yo took an overdose this past Thursday and I did not see it coming.
how are you and your daughter getting on?

@iamnotalemon do you mind if I ask what made you want to take your own life?