OH seems annoyed that I'm ill.

[BumbleWomp]

I've been signed off from work with low mood/stress. I'm feeling awful, very fragile and just incredibly low.
This morning I slept in and he got up with our toddler. I woke about 12 and was feeling a little bit better for the rest. When I came downstairs he ignored me/was banging things around quite aggressively which he knows I find really triggering. He then left about 20 mins later and only said bye as he was walking out through the front door.
I'm not sure I want him to come back tonight. It seems me being unwell is an inconvenience. I wonder if I had a more "legitimate" illness in his eyes if he would be kinder. He's had his own mental health struggles on the past and I've always thought I was compassionate and supportive at the time but maybe I was wrong. I think he thinks i should take pills and get over it. However I'm burnt out, no amount of pills are going to fix that. I need to rest and I will be back to myself given time.
Equally if I had been well enough to work today I would have been out of the house at work, and therefore, everything he was doing would have been his responsibility anyway. I should add I'm trying to be proactive. Yesterday a friend took me out for coffee. I'm reading books to help me find better strategies going forwards. I'm doing some bits of art becausethat always lifts my mood. I've booked to see a therapist. I had planned to go for a walk along the coast today but I feel really upset by OH and have got back into bed. His behaviour has really knocked me sideways.

I'm just not sure if I'm being unreasonable because I'm feeling so fragile. He has the tendency to bottle up his feelings/opinions and only says something as a counter argument if I bring stuff up.
I'm just questioning everything right now but dont reallyfeel in the right frame of mind to have a balanced view on things.

Bump

Anyone?

I think you answered your own question. It's an invisible illness and people struggle to have sympathy or have sympathy at first but it wanes faster than if say a broken leg.

But when you're burnt out, you're burnt out and need to take a bit of time to collect yourself.

However I think self care shouldn't be staying in bed. It's taking the pressure off but keeping in a routine. Sometimes staying in bed can prolong a burn out. It doesn't lift your mood at all. You really should do the walk you had planned. Even if you're not out for long, it might help a bit getting some fresh air.

Have a chat with him, reminding him of when he has his own struggles and the support you offered. He needs a bit of patience and this isn't forever

I think that this is sadly quite common OP, some people just don't get it even if they have suffered themselves they can't understand that everyone is different and has different coping strategies. How was he with you when he came home? Maybe try posting this elsewhere for more responses as I don't think this sub gets a lot of traffic.

You seem to be doing everything for you.
Can't you involve OH, plan walks with him, plan days in which you want to lie on, equally if he's struggled with MH before, you don't want him back at square one.
So allocate him days to lie in, go for lunch together, can't you do it as a Team with full communication?

His domestic appliance has broken.

Out of interest, when was the last time he brought you a bunch of flowers?

What a ridiculous assumption based on literally nothing.

And the flowers question is facile.

It's hard OP. hard for you and hard for him. I've been supporting my DH with burnout for several months. He's now so much better but it was a terrible strain for months. I found it hard trying to juggle everything at home and work. In the end my DH did start doing domestic chores as he found it helped him to be active. My DH did take medication for burnout because it had such a terrible effect on his mood. Neither of you are right or wrong - it's just hard and he's bound to express his frustration occasionally. How long have you been unwell?