Depressed Son

[NoKnickerElastic]

DS is in his first year at Uni and has been very open about struggling with his mental health. He sought advice and has been having talking therapy type counselling once a month. He said it's not enough and doesn't help so he's decided to go down the medication route. In my opinion he hasn't given the counselling enough time, nor enough time to settle into uni life but it's his decision as an adult. He's just started taking sertraline 50mg and tells me it's ok to drink on it. I'm very worried about this as there are differing opinions online. As a student he has something of a party lifestyle but if I question him too much he stops being so open with me. Is anyone able to reassure me about the efficacy of this medication & concern about mixing with alcohol? I've no experience of mental health meds & have so many questions that I can't bombard DS with. Thanks.

This is what the NHS website says:

You can drink alcohol while taking sertraline, but it may make you feel sleepy.
It might be best to stop drinking alcohol until you see how the medicine makes you feel.

It is ok to drink on it. He is correct. I hope he feels better very soon.

I am sorry to hear your son is struggling but well done to him for being proactive in getting help. xxx

Does your Son understand that alcohol is a depressant.

@touty I honestly don't know. He's a clever lad and will definitely have researched depression and meds etc but I have to choose my moments to bring things like this up. He just reacts like he's being lectured. He's not a massive drinker but does enjoy the stereotypical student pub and clubbing.

I’m so sorry to hear your son isn’t well and that you feel so worried about him. How are you doing? What support do you have in place for you? I’m wondering if rather than needing advice on what’s going on for your son and how you support him, you actually need support yourself? It’s hard to have them be unwell especially in this way and accept that it’s no longer your role to make it better. I struggle so much with this. I loved the baby to primary school ages where they were these amazing additions to my life and I had them within my domain and control. I have found secondary school, university and onwards has required a lot of self reflection and found losing the control challenging. I come across as a very relaxed and laid back parent based on the feedback others give but my children wouldn’t say that! I do listen to what they say though. If your son is feeling lectured when you try and help then you’re offering help he doesn’t want and isn’t asking for.

All you can be as a parent of adult children is a support and a safe place for them to land. You cannot force them to accept the support you want to give or force them to give you any element of control or decision making. Any attempt to do so will be unhelpful to them and likely damage your relationship or alienate them.

You’ve done a great job of raising him to be an independent young man. He’s gone to ask for help from the right place. His GP will talk to him about alcohol and anything else they think is medically relevant. I hope he’s feeling much better soon.

All the best.

Thank you @jumpinggreenfrogs but I'm genuinely fine. I think it's normal to be worried about a YP away from home for the first time navigating new mental health issues themselves. I'm just trying to understand the implications of medication so I'm informed. I do not lecture my adult son, but as he's also still a 'know it all' teenager, any kind of interest is often treated with suspicion! We have honest open discussions when he wants to talk (which isn't all the time due to his depression & distance from home) so by asking here I am trying to avoid unnecessary questioning for him.

It is fantastic that he feels able to talk to you and be open ( your relationship is testament to that) and I totally get that you don't want to alienate him by lecturing etc.

I have been on sertraline and other ADs in the past . I am not a big drinker, but not tee total either. On Sertraline I would drink and feel fine - I always ensure I drink lots of water anyway (prone to UTIs) to stay hydrated.
Another AD I was on (SNRI) alcohol made me far too drowsy . The warning on this one suggested total avoidance, whereas Sertraline it did not.

As PP stated, alcohol IS a depressant, and it can become a slippery slope to use it as a coping mechanism.

@jenkib thank you that's really helpful. He tells me he knows he can't overdo the alcohol now he's on medication and has recently taken a couple of weeks off so I'm hopeful he doesn't use booze as a crutch when things are bad.

I’m sure he is bright but you know there really is a lack of education around alcohol, no one is taught that it’s a poison and that it can wreak havoc on mental health. The government certainly will not educate us, I don’t know what education they give about it in schools now if anything.

It’s easy to believe that because it’s sold in shops and readily available that its ok to drink.