Depression or Perimenopause

[BeckyWithTheGoodBear]

Hi All,

I'm 43 and for the last 6 months or so my mental health has been declining. Some days I'm ok but a lot of the time I feel like crying, my self esteem is rock bottom and I've been having panic attacks.

I'm functioning as in I'm working and looking after my kids but I've no motivation for anything. The house is a mess but I can't be bothered cleaning it. I just want to doomscroll while simultaneously feeling very bored with life.

I've also been drinking more than usual, I think for the escapism. I also feel myself emotionally withdrawing from DH and my parents. I just feel really sad and want to be by myself.

I had mental health problems as a teenager and young adult, anorexia and panic disorder, but recovered and have generally felt ok since having children.

Obviously nobody can diagnose me over the internet but does it sound like it could be perimenopause symptoms or a mental health issue? I'm getting quite worried about myself but have a huge fear of going to the doctor

If you managed to get this far, thank you.

I think it's possibly a bit of both. Get to GP, they will more than likely want to try out low dose anti depressant like prozac first. I'm 47, been on prozac (fluoxetine) for 5 years now. It helped initially but not now. I think menopausal symptoms have taken over 😕.

GP just insisted on increasing antidepressant dose 😡.

I think perimenopause can magnify what iis already there sometimes., That is what happened for me. I do think you would benefit from speaking to your GP. Take care.

Hey there,
if you can spare an hour watch this talk on youtube, Georgia Ede MD - What is nutritional and metabolic psychiatry #PHC2023
Ok, the title is not too promising but the speaker is psychiatrist who advocates for people to understand the link between diet and brain health and mental health. It is enlightening and funny and makes a lot of sense.
Watch it and see what you think. If changing your diet can improve symptoms of anxiety, depression and menopause, it might be worth a try.
Best of luck.

Thank you all for the advice. I think you may be right that's it a mixture of both. I'm sure changing hormone levels can play a part especially in pre existing conditions.

I will check out the nutritional talk, thanks for the recommendation @Sajacas My diet hadn't been great so that could be a contributing factor and something to try before medication.

I really feel for you. It can be hard to accept medication for mental health reasons but if you do have a mental illness, medication can help you get better and stop you getting worse. I went to the doctors on and off for decades with health issues, which I felt I was making a fuss about but, in hindsight, I was under-complaining. I though I was making an unnecessary fuss, they thought I had a bit of mild depression - but actually I was masking a severe mood disorder. Self help worked until it didn’t and I went ping in my early 50s (perimenopause was mentioned). I am on a mood stabiliser now but also have to use a lot of strategies to keep on the best even keel I can. It was awful going ping. I thought my life would never be the same. But actually it is 99% the same. With the added advantage that when I go, “umm…could you possibly help me” I get noticed and helped!

Non-medical things that help me:

• exercise - I don’t just mean a walk or jog. High intensity CrossFit classes. I go every day I can. I have also been known to do some body weight exercises in the loo at parties/work events I’ve been struggling at.
• cold water dipping
• prepping food in the good moments so I have healthy meals in the feeezer that I can just microwave in the tougher moments.
• good multivitamin and probiotic
• water. I try and drink roughly a pint every hour or two.
• accept my coping mechanisms (eating junk and doom scrolling) and use them when I need to without (too much) guilt.
• avoid rumination at all costs. I try and leave the past firmly in the past.
• value and prioritise sleep.

Be careful of the drinking. That can be a very slippery slope very quickly and can leave to a very dark place that it is hard to climb out of. I would recommend AA. I would like to go myself but I don’t drink so dont feel I can. They will have ways of helping with mental health as it’s a big part of drinking issues.

Thank you for the advice @JumpingGreenFrogs I'm glad you are feeling better now. I exercise a lot already as it helped with my previous MH issues but I definitely could do with a multivitamin, more sleep etc.

I absolutely agree with you on the alcohol it certainly is a slippery slope. I also think it's making me feel a lot worse in the long run. I think I'll have to cut right down/abstain.