CBT - anyone know anything about it ?

[TheodoresMummy]

I was DX with PND when DS was 12 months, had it earlier, but waited until I couldn't cope before I asked HV and GP for support.

They were both very supportive. Was on Fluoxitine for prob 6 months, then changed to citilopram (sp). Both were ok, but never lasted long. Came off Cit and never went back to GP . Figured I needed to get over it myself if ADs were not going to last more than a few months at a time.

I must say that just by getting on with things I have not been too bad, DS is now (4.5). But I have been feeling rather crap again for quite a few months (although not dreadful).

I am studying, but falling behind (typical of me and I hate it).

DS has just been DX with Aspergers, which is actually a relief as I can now understand him a lot better, but I also now need to dedicate more time to form filling, support sessions (very grateful for these btw), DLA application, Statement for support at school...

I am a bit overweight. Not sure how much and I know it's not massively important, but I so want to slim down. I hate my figure. It really does depress me (pathetic eh ?)

I eat fairly well, but could be better. I drink a glass of wine every evening (my treat) and will have two if DH is home. I need to exercise more. I swim, but hate how I look in a swimming costume, etc...

Should I go back to GP and ask for ADs to give me a boost to try to get back on top of things ? Or is CBT an option ? Is it free ?

When the ADs kicked in before, I actually felt better than I had since being a small kid. Could I have actually been depressed all that time through teens and half of my twenties ?

I have never been able to stick at studying despite being clever enough. I am sick of feeling this way.

Sorry it's so long (and self indulgent). I really need some help tho...

Hi TheodoresMummy. You're not being self indulgent at all as being depressed is so all consuming (speaking from personal experience). I'm currently on Seroxat and have been for years - on and off for pg. I'd say it's worth a stint on ADs if they have worked for you before. There's no shame in it and nobody has to know except you. I've had some CBT and it is helpful up to a point and yes it's free on the nhs but you'll have to be referred and there could be a long waiting list. I'm reading a very good book at the moment called Manage your Mind and would highly recommend it as it has some really useful advice about so many different subjects to do with mental health. Sending you lots of good wishes.

Hi TM - so sorry you're feeling crappy. CBT provision varies a lot depending on where you are in the country, and the waiting lists can be massive. So if you underplay feeling bad to your GP you probably won't get on the list for it. Horrid reality of NHS provision.

If you're motivated enough to read and want to change, then there are lots of CBT self-help books. 'Mind over Mood' is good, and Melanie Fennell's Overcoming Low self-esteem might be useful?

Going for a brief 30 min walk (fast enough to be a bit out of breath) once a day could be a start -exercise is great for mood. Could you get a friend to motivate you or get your partner to insist that you go out, then have the wine as a reward when you get back? I think for moderate depression exercise is more effective than ADs, but some people find they might need to use ADs to kickstart other more permanent changes in their lives.

Good luck, and hope you get lots of support with the AS diagnosis as well as for yourself.

I've had a lot of CBT and would recommend it to most people. There isn't always a long waiting list on the NHS and even if there is it is worth the wait - after all it might help you an awful lot. There will be a lot more CBT available on the NHS in the next few years but I wouldn;t wait until then if I were you.

tbh I would say you would need to combine ADs and CBT as the ADs will help you concentrate on the CBT and make it more effective. You don't always need ADs when you have CBT, just from what you mention in your post I think you might find it the best way.

CBT will help you with a lot of what you describe in your post and is defintely worth a try. There are several books you can read but tbh most people need the help of a psychologist to achieve a good result - only those with mild to moderate depression can self-help with great success. There are also online courses you can try if you draw a blank with the NHS but I should hope you have a decent GP who will recognise your need.

It is quite possible you could have depression since your teens as it is not uncommon at all.

Good luck

Thanks for replies guys.

Off to work now, but will read again later.

Go back to GP TheodoresMummy and talk to him about maybe going back on AD's for a few months. Ask to be referred for councilling, either on a one to one basis, ask for CBT approach. Better still ask if there are any therapeutic groups that you can be referred to. These will probably use a CBT approach too, and are very supportive, motivational, and can help you re - activate your lifestyle, therefore lessening the likelyhood of relapse. The groups are so supportive because its sometimes a revelation to find out that other people feel very similar to you. You can give each other support, feedback and tips on how to improve your confidence and overcome depression.

Make sure you go for a swim regularly, go for regular walks. Exercise, fresh air, and natural light do wonders for the mood.

Maybe talk to someone at your college about how you are struggling a bit at the moment. They may be able to support you ie by giving you more tutorial support, etc.

Are there any sopprt networks in your area for parents of children with DX Aspergers? This can be invaluable too.

Use your family and friends for help and support through this difficult time. If you have spare time meet up with friends, go out for a walk and a coffee, this is good for the mood too.

You may well have been depressed for a long time, in teens and twenties, but you can get over it!!

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply everybody.

We have been offered 2 different courses (can go on both) that will hopefully help us to understand DS's Aspergers better, but they don't start 'til next term. There is a support group for parents and I am going to try to get to next weeks meeting (DH is working tho so will need to get a sitter and scrounge a lift) - I don't drive.

I think I will go and see GP again. Feel very sheepish as I just stopped going , but she is very nice and was very supprtive before. Will discuss ADs with her and ask about CBT, just feels so self indulgent to go and ask for things for myself like that. But I need to get myself better.

I will talk to my tutor at college too. Just don't want people thinking I am unreliable and one of those students who ALWAYS hands assignments in late, ALWAYS has an excuse...

I will also try to exercise a lot more, but time and motivation are scarce...

I am at college when DS is at nursery and DH runs some restaurants, so works lots of hours and can't always be around when I could do with a sitter.

My Mum is ace, but didn't really want to tell her i'm feeling low again. I know it makes her sad .

Sounds like you have some good, positive steps to recovery planned there.

Good luck with everything. Do make sure you see your GP - ask for CBT and ADs if you want them you owe it to yourself and your family.

I'm sure your GP will understand- it is very common for people to disappear when things get bad. I stayed away from my GP for ages with a similar situation and when I eventually went to see him again he said he had wondered what had happened to me and said I should have come back earlier .

Hello TheodoresMummy! So glad to hear you are going back to see you GP. It seems like you really know what to do and are taking such positive steps towards recovery, so dont feel embarrassed about going to talk to your GP again!!

I'm glad your mum is so good. I know its so hard telling loved ones that you feel depressed. But it seems like you are close, and that she would support you.

She will be reassured that you are seeking help, and that you plan to do group work and/or have councilling to sure up the recovery process.

No doubt she will be pleased to see you feeling better and more confident during the next few weeks.

Best of luck, and keep posting!!

Well I have been phoning the Docs all morning and they are either engaged or it rings and rings for 2 mins + !!

I'm fed up.

I should be at college, but can't face it.

I need to email my tutor today as I have a tutorial tomorrow and I can't go through it face to face

But I don't know what to say.

You might be suprised how much your tutor can help if you let him know what is going on.

I had a very bad spell while at university - lecturers noticed something was wrong but didn't know what. I went from being very attentive and keen to almost completely absent. In the end I told them what was going on and they were very understanding and helpful - turns out they have helped people in the same situation before. I left it too late really and was incredibly embarrassed by it all at the time so I let it ruin things for me.

It's not the easiest thing I know but if you felt you could possibly tell your tutor then I think you should.

Keep trying with the docs!

Walked to the docs to make an appointment in the end , but managed to get one for this a-noon.

So went in feeling a bit of a fraud because I was actually feeling ok-ish today. GP remembered me and was very nice...cue...me sobbing !!!

Anyway we talked a bit about DS's DX and the fact that he is hard work at the mo, also talked about a few other things. She asked what I wanted to do and we agreed to start on Citilopram to get me 'up'.

Seeing her again in 2 and a half weeks. Will talk to her about some CBT then. Couldn't get to it today.

Thanks for your support guys.

Thats good news. Really pleased you have made some steps towards getting things sorted.

So glad you haev a nice GP who remembered you - I think that is a fantastic help.

Good luck with the citalopram, hope it starts working soon. Def ask about the CBT next time if you still want it - that'll hopefully get the ball rolling on the waiting list front.

CBT is good for anxiety. However, I struggle with my own mental health and I don't think it would help me now but it really depends on your individual situation.

Hello again. Glad your you got to see your GP and that she was undertsanding of your situation. Hope the citalopram works well. Hopefully in a couple of weeks your mood will feel better.

Hope it went OK with your tutor, and sorting out how you can catch up with your work. I hope they were undertstanding too.

Is your mum in the picture yet?

So glad you recognised the warning signs of depression early and saught support early, so that you can nip it in the bud.

You've got so much on your plate at the mo' : being a mom, studying at college, your son having Aspergers and all that comes with that.

In my experience CBT really helps people to think more positively, therefore alleviating some of the symptoms of depression.

Good luck with all your steps to recovery, you have caught it early, so the out look is postitive.

Thanks cherrylips .

My tutor was fine. I am part time, continuing next year, so she wasn't bothered. But I didn't tell her about DS's DX or being depressed , just that I had been off and fallen behind a bit. Was going to elaborate, but others turned up (it was a group tutorial). Think I will email her though as I want to be upfront.

Mum not in the picture yet. Not sure. She would just worry.

How quickly do the ADs have side effects ? I took one yesterday and felt a bit sick later on. Took the second one today and have felt sick, lethargic and a bit lightheaded on and off all day. Am I imagining it ?

Hello TheodoresMummy. How are you feeling today?

Yes, the side effects of ADs happen really quickly. The ones you are feeling are extremely common : nausia, tiredness and being lightheaded.

Persevere with the side effects if you can, as your body gets used to the ADs the side effects should disipate.

Mention the side effects you are experiencing to your GP. She may have started you on a low dose of Citalopram to begin with, when you go back to see her in say a weeks time, she may increase the dose. This may also help the side effects lessen or stop altogether.

Try to be gentle on yourself TheodoresMummy (I know this is easier said than done!!). Plenty of early nights whilst you feel so tired.

Hope you feel better very soon!

Hi, you asked about CBT, so far as I understand it attempts to change your thinking regarding situations whether they are actually negative or whether you perceive them as being negative.

If, you are like me and have about as much optimism as the British Public do about Gordon Brown helping hard - up families, then CBT is for you. Do you make mountains out of mole hills, creating situations in your head that may not actually happen and constantly thinking about whet others perceive of you?

If so then I think CBT is for you. I cannot comment on the AD's because I don't feel they are good for you this is just my personal opnion as I have specifically chosen not to have AD's to combat my serious issues I have with myself, I have been depressed most of my life and view myself in a very negative way.
I hope that helps somewhat, and I wish you a lot of luck.

TheodoresMummy on Wed 14-May-08 22:24:36

"My tutor was fine. I am part time, continuing next year, so she wasn't bothered. But I didn't tell her about DS's DX or being depressed , just that I had been off and fallen behind a bit. Was going to elaborate, but others turned up (it was a group tutorial). Think I will email her though as I want to be upfront."

I would definitely tell your tutor the truth. I am a uni teacher myself and we often see students with health issues, either mental or physical. It is just SO much easier to help somebody when you know what is going on. Most teachers really want to help, and there is now quite a lot of support in the system to make it easier.

Theodoresmummy - hope you are not suffering too much with the side effects of the citalopram. I suffered pretty badly with mine - it got worse every day for about four days and then just when I though 'nope, don't fancy those any more' the whole lot disappeared and I was fine. Stick at it for as long as you can - it will be worth it.

You can also start on a 10mg dose if you prefer then work your way up to your prescribed dose without any side-effects but best talk to your doc about that first. I have done this - 10mg side effects were hardly anything (and I tend to get dizzy/nausea quite easily) and as I increased my dose I didn't get any side effects at all. Citalopram is one of the least likely SSRIs to give side effects. I started on Sertraline but it made me feel very, very sick so I swapped to Cit - maybe an extra day on the sertraline would have been all I needed...who knows. The citalopram helped me a lot anyway .

Hope you have managed to compose an email to your tutor. I'm sure that will help too.

Thanks everyone.

I am taking 20mg of Citalopram. I haven't felt as sick today, but have been very tired all day. Should go to bed really, but I take ages to go to sleep. My mind races about all sorts...

It helps that DS is being very calm and happy at the moment, although still his 'quirky' self.

Wurlywoo - from your post I would say that I should look into CBT then.

I do everything whilst looking at myself from others' points of view (does that make sense ?). I always think about the worst that might happen and usually let it put me off doing things. I think I am crap therefore I usually end up being crap.

However, I am not as bad as I used to be, believe it or not, so there is hope I suppose.

Thanks for the support guys. It means a lot.

I have not even told DH that I have been to Docs and have been given ADs (although they are in the kitchen by the kettle, he hasn't asked what they are ).

Definitely recommend CBT - take all you are offered, it's very helpful for all sorts of things! I find your line 'I think I am crap and therefore I end up being crap' interesting - CBT will show you

a) yes, you think you are crap
b) actually you aren't
c) you aren't any more crap than the average person and in fact you are less crap than some at certain things
d) and that's fine

I haven't been on Cit for a while now but I seem to think they recommend you take it in the morning but that made me tired all day and unable to sleep at night. I experimented taking it 30 mins before bedtime and slept far better and had more energy in the day. I think I have read of others on MN who do the same. Would probably be best to save that experiement until you are settled on the tablets though as it does have a short half life and can upset your settling in period.

Of course insommnia, tiredness etc can be down to your condition and not the medication. Thats the thing with ADs, a lot of the reported side effects are symptoms of the condition itself so it sometimes had to say what is a true side effect and what isn't.

Do you think your DH will support your treatment? I hope so..

Hello TheodoresMummy .

I'm with BigBadMouse regarding the CBT, I think its a very useful tool to changing the way you feel - and overcoming depression, anxiety - or both.

Its helped me no end, and I've been the one doing it with clients .

Hope those unpleasant side effects are lessening.

Husbands - what are they like. Reckon mine would be the same!!