How can I make peace with my body?

[Lemonandlime123]

Does anybody else just think about their body constantly? I am so fed up of thinking about it everyday. I hate my body and feel disgusting most of the time. Everyday I think this is going to be the day I stop eating or go on an extreme diet (I know this isn’t the right thing to do) but I never do and then just continue to feel awful.

I am size 12. I did suffer from anorexia when I was 15 and my eating was really disordered in my early 20s, I would starve myself for days so I could go out and binge drink.

My eating settled a bit in my late 20s when I met my now DH and I have two amazing DDs. I would say that I now eat a normal diet but I just absolutely hate myself. I try to exercise regularly but find it difficult to find the time as my DH is self employed and works long hours and weekends.

I just want to find peace with my body and I don’t know how, I don’t want to feel like this forever. Has anybody else suffered with these thoughts and found a way through? A friend has recommended ‘You are not a before picture’ which I have started reading.

I am nearly 60 I am fat.
I long for the times I could walk into any store and buy clothing.
I know your not happy with the body you have but not even seeing you I know you look amazing you just need to realise it.
Motherhood and time add on the pounds, so please be kind to yourself and live a good life.

You might find the BDD Foundation helpful, they have lots of information and support. Beat is an eating disorder charity that has a good website and helpline.

You might also find CBT helpful. You can do a free course online called Beating the Blues.

You wouldn't go out of your way to help a person that you 'hated', would you?

If you can't love yourself (yet) try at least to be neutral. Therapy would help, to uncover and correct the maladjusted thought patterns from earlier in your life.

Op, losing weight isn't everything. It'll just be a sticking plastic until you find something else to dislike about yourself.

I reached a uk size 14 after dc2 was born (this was the biggest I had ever been). Having a toddler, and a new baby during lock down, with extreme sleep deprivation led to it. I then lost the weight gradually, and now I'm at size uk 8-10, bmi of 22. In clothes I looks good, only it still isn't enough. Now I'm focusing more on my stretch marks from having babies, and my breasts which are smaller due to the weight loss. I am also focusing on getting older in general. It is never ending. It is your mindset you need to improve, not your body.

It was supposed to say plaster!

I try to focus on other things - not my body - my skills, character, morals, having things to do that I enjoy. The body is a carrier for me, so it needs to be tended like a car but like a car it's purely function that matters. Think about the people you love- parents , childen - would you still love them if they didn't look as good? I'd guess yes. So treat yourself the same way.

• I chose clothes because I like how they look without me in them and if they feel comfortable on I won't look much in a mirror to see if they suit me or not - I'd get someone else to comment to avoid total social fall out

( I suspect I had what is now called gender dysmorphia when younger and now it's just a mild disgust )