Stuck in fear

[Inthebluecar]

I got to work this morning and couldn't go inside. Instead I sat in the carpark for ages panicking and then phoned 111 option 2 who to did some breathing exercises with me and suggested I phone work and go home.
I have driven to a branch of Samaritans that offers face to face listening, but I'm too scared to go in. I feel completely stuck right now. Scared to do anything.
I'm not sure why I'm writing this. Except that I feel like I am losing my mind or losing grip on reality and I don't know what to do.

I’m so sorry this is happening to you.

Can I suggest you just get out of your car for now and perhaps just walk to the door and wait a few minutes. You don’t have to go in.

Once you are there, perhaps you will feel able to go in?

Alternatively, can you ring them and explain you are outside?

Keep doing the breathing and take it steady.

You are doing amazingly. You've had the presence of mind to reach out and get help at the time when you're feeling most vulnerable. I envy that - I find it so difficult to ask for help. Sometimes I don't go to work meetings (on Teams)...I see the call started and I can't do it. But then I shut my laptop and refuse to answer the phone.

You did one thing to help yourself today (phoning 111) so don't pressure yourse;f to take another step unless you want to. Remember they aren't going to judge you, they're trained to help and want to.

i have never done face to face with them, but have phoned them and they are SO understanding / not judge

Thank you everyone.
I couldn't bring myself to go in but I did call them later and it did help me feel a bit calmer.

I find it difficult to ask for help too, but have reached the point of feeling scared if I don't get some.