Dm dog died

[Thornybush]

Hi, my Mum lost her 15 year old dog a few months ago and her mental health seems to be suffering since. I'm getting worried about her. She seems hyper focused with finding out what caused the cancer ddog died from. She can't seem to understand or accept that he was of quite an advanced age and probably wouldn't have lived much longer anyway, had he not got cancer. This overthinking has started her going off on rants about vaccines and how they are to blame for everything. She still cries every day re ddog. She can't focus on anything and her conversations are hard to dollow as she goes into tangeants. Everything is directed back to this. She's very agitated when rambling. Is this normal or do you think she is suffering with her mental health?

*hard to follow
*also she is 65

I would gently suggest that she could benefit from a chat with her GP, maybe on the premise of talking about vaccines. She sounds like she needs professional help.

I’m so sorry to hear of your mum’s loss. She’s grieving hard by the sounds of things. Hopefully someone else will come along with some words of wisdom.
Have you considered posting in the doghouse topic? They might be able to provide some better insight and support

This overthinking has started her going off on rants about vaccines and how they are to blame for everything

Grief isn't rational, and the relationship with a family pet can be as close as that with a child. Closer, if it's filling the gap left when adult children have left home.

Were there any signs that she was going down the anti-vax rabbit hole before she lost the dog? My experience of someone that had been sucked into the conspiracy theory realm was that everything that happened in their life was interpreted as a reinforcement of that point of view.

65 is very young to be showing these symptoms - I think you need a doctor to check her out.

People are often "grounded" by pets, espcially is they have a very close bond. That doesn't in itself explain what is going on with her, but it may be that the dogs death has exacerbated an underlying condition, and that conversely a new pet might help her. All other things being equal, perhaps rehoming an elderly dog may be worth looking at - they are often not what people want so are hard to rehome.

Thank you for your compassionate replies. We have asked her if she wants to get another dog but she flat out refuses saying that shes not ready and that maybe she will in a few years. She still has his bed in the kitchen and his stuffed toy. She is completely heartbroken.

Yes she did speak about being anti- vacc previously but since her dog died she has definitely become more obsessive about this. She was diagnosed as bipolar previously but she completely denies and claims that the doctors were wrong. Instead blames her circumstances at this time. She refused to take any form of medication at the time but seemed to be coping ok until now. So she definitely won't accept that she has mh issues, she is very stubborn.

Great idea, thank you 😊

The Blue Cross has a helpline and online forum/chat for pet bereavement which may be helpful for your mum to speak to - they will speak to many people who are struggling in a similar way. It is a massive loss, and will take time for her to adapt, so i'm not surprised she doesn't feel ready for a new dog just yet. I also know how stubborn older people can be (my MIL is the same and similar MH issues), but worth keeping trying to get her to see the GP and accept any help offered.

I came on to suggest the Blue Cross too
https://www.bluecross.org.uk/pet-bereavement-and-pet-loss

Thank you both , I'll pass this on to her 🥰

So sorry to hear about your mum and her struggles with the grief .
Would her chatting to the vet help her ?
When my dog was PTS I struggled to process it and she did allay some concerns I had . (The euthanasia process )