My mental health has not been the best for many years (in fact since my son was stillborn 15 years ago) but I have a living son to care for so I seem to plod on regardless. I'm in my 50's.
My husband has been ill with bowel/digestive problems for about 8 years now and he's also recently begun delving into his childhood with ACA (adult children of alcoholics). It's very emotional for him to realise how much he was neglected.
Recently I find that I'm utterly tired of discussing his mental health, his pain (which is significant), his bowel movements and hearing him burp and fart his way through the day. He truly can't help it, he's in pain most of the time and it's utterly consumed him but it has also consumed me.
I feel we are lost to his illness. I feel like I want to run away but there's really nowhere I want to go without him and I feel terribly guilty for these thoughts too.
I have an appointment with my doctor so I do know I need help but I suppose I just wanted to put it out there. I'm tired.