just have to get this out

[feel1ngblue]

I moved from City A to Town B when i found out i was pregnant, and even though i have been here for a year and managed to make a couple of friends, i just miss City A.

I do go out to mother and baby groups, and make a real effort but i just have moments when i feel SO lonely. I know this is common, i just need to get it down on 'paper'. I get upset when the other mums say, oh lets get together, take my number then don't call. This has happened a couple of times and it makes me sad. I try not to let it bother me, but sometimes it does get to me - like today, and yesterday.

I used to have a fairly active social life, and i know that i am just having a moment and feeling a bit sorry for myself. It's just hard to make friends.

Message withdrawn

I know how you feel - I moved when baby was months.

I have been here 2 years and finally feel like I have a circle of friends/acquaintances. It has taken some effort though, as everybody is busy, and I'm a bit reluctant to 'take up people's time'.

Next time, say you'll ring them, or make a firm arrangement.

I do, and i did, i rang a woman from my antenatal class and arranged to see her, after seeing her at the HV. So i am making an effort it is just so difficult at times. Especially when my circle of frinds is so far away. I do text and call my friends in City A on a regular ie weekly basis. I am just having a moment. I don't feel depressed - have been there in the past and know the difference, i just feel overwhelmingly lonely at times. Like now.

How long does it take to settle into a place?

Remember that the mums who take your number don't know for sure whether you really want them to call or whether you're just being polite. They might feel as unsure as you do.

I have been in your situation - moved from London to a little country village when DS1 was 10 weeks. I made it my top priority to get out every day, go to every single group I could find and chat to anyone. I would also invite people over. Now, I ended up with some friends who I didn't particularly bond with, but I can say I was never lonely, apart from missing DH who commuted.

Funnily enough, I'm back in London now, in a new area and am making very little effort on the friendship front but this evening one of the mums from school said 'we must get together' and I made a firm date there and then.

You need to take the lead here.

I know i need to take the lead - hence me calling the mum from my antenatal group. I too moved from London to a place 'up north' - i just miss my friends. I totally take on board the need to go to groups, etc and i do. I just feel intimidated at times when it appears that the other mums know each other and i feel like a kid at my first day at school IYSWIM

where are you? maybe someone on here you could meet up with for a coffee.

North Cheshire, i have looked on the mumnet local threads, but they are very quiet TBH. I know that long term i will be ok, and that given time i will make new friends etc, it's just hard to start over. As i said i know that i am not the only one with this experience i just had to get it out

It is hard, keep at it, it will get better.