Post natal anxiety

[LivelyGoose]

It's a long one from me I'm afraid. Some background: I had my baby eight days ago. The birth went well apart from some drama at the end which featured low heart rate and shoulder dystocia from baby, and excessive blood loss from me. It was all quickly resolved and we were allowed home the next day. My partner and I are head over heels and can't imagine life without our little boy. My partner is incredibly supportive and involved and does as much as me, if not more, in terms of looking after him. I have a history of anxiety and depression and I felt very low for parts of my pregnancy, especially in the third trimester. I was great the first couple of days after my son was born, very sleep deprived but utterly euphoric and high and completely overwhelmed with love for him and my partner. When my milk came in my baby stopped latching and it transpired that he has a tongue tie, which we have an appointment to have looked at in two days time. I've had to start bottle feeding and I hate it. He's currently cluster feeding and the 24/7 cycle of cleaning and sterilising bottles, expressing milk and mixing formula with a hungry baby waiting to be fed is exhausting. I also feel like it's eating into our bonding time together. My milk supply has been affected and the supplementary formula has made him really constipated and gassy, which makes me feel guilty.

I crashed hard on day five when tiredness, hormones, and the feeding situation hit me like a ton of bricks. For the last three days I've been experiencing bouts of extreme tearfulness and anxiety in the evenings and can't calm down. I seem to get to about 5pm and have a huge dip in mood and feel incredibly nervous and wired and easily upset all evening. It's affecting what little sleep I am getting and I'm absolutely shattered. My partner works offshore and he's going back on the 7th of November. I'm totally terrified of not being able to cope while he's gone and sliding into full blown PND. I have an appointment set up with the antenatal mental health team and I'm already taking sertraline (for the past four and a half years). In the absence of any immediate help and no concrete solutions in place at this time, can anyone offer me anything by way of reassurance, help, advice, literally anything to make me feel better? Thank you if you've read this far.

It's very early days. You need to be kind to yourself, it will get better, I was very anxious with my first child. You will gradually get more confident. Try to get some sleep during the day if your partner can take over for a while. Don't think too far ahead take one day at a time.

Great advice from previous poster. You are at a typically difficult time in terms of hormones and emotions and the evening anxiety
Is very common but it will pass as you get more in to the swing od things. This is brand new to you and it's scary but you've got this and you just need to be kind to yourself over the next few weeks and don't think too far ahead in terms of how you are feeling. Just day by day

Hormones do dip after birth
Goidyoure aware of PND but it's juat as like its baby blues. Get to the GP if it doesn't wear off.

Can you put a little ad in the local shop along the lines "Mother's Help required for a few hours a day Monday-Friday for a few weeks starting from the 5th of November? No experience necessary. Hours and renumeration to be discussed."

This little cash in hand job could be a real help to you and a realy benefit to a mother with a child at nursery. Alternatively, to a A-level student contemplating career in childcare.

I paid someone for 2.5 hours a day following the birth of my 2nd when I ended up being torn between my newborn and my toddler. The woman had a child at the local nursery. We all benefited hugely. Early days with the first born are notoriously difficult. Are you taking your iron tablets?