BPD - Getting diagnosed (TW suicide ideations)

[DonkeySong]

Hi,

TW - brief mentions of suicidal thoughts.

NC for this one.

Been suffering with poor MH for as long as I can remember. Taken anti depressants for probably over 6 years in two forms, a few suicdal spells, with plans made on occasion and then just general prevaling thoughts for extended periods.

History of unstable relationships and suffice to say I've put previous, and most importantly current DP through hell and endless worry about it, as well as the associated problems poor MH brings to relationships.

I've been to my GP twice now and begged for a clinical diagnosis as I'm convinced I've got BPD but the bar for psychiatric services beyond CBT seems super high in my area. Been waiting for my ADHD referral for ages too.

Has anyone successfully got to see a clinical pyscatrist and what did you 'say' to your GP to obtain the illusive refferal?

I really don't want to end up back on the general counselling train again as I've (shamefully) not stuck with it and I don't think it fair I take a place in that queue again when I've not fully committed to their processes.

Thank you!

The feeling like a broken human? I know it well. It's getting less than it was but yeah.

You deserve help. I'm going to hope and pray like mad that you get it.

Yes the online DBT in our area is the proper real long term thing.

Our area also has ACT and schema therapy available on the NHS but all of it is online group based. A lot of people instantly refuse as soon as group and online is mentioned because they want in person 1:1 but realistically the only way the NHS can make these therapies available to people is via online groups because they don't have the amount of trained therapists to offer 1:1. The online is so that it can be geographically fair.

CPTSD recommended therapy would be EMDR or trauma focused CBT which are 1:1 but again you need a lot of grounding and stabilisation skills to be able to do those therapies safely and these are available via the online groups in our area. The wait for trauma therapy however is over a year because of it needing to be 1:1 and not enough trained therapists.

It's good that there are alternatives available too because although DBT is brilliant for many people, it isn't one size fits all, of course, as with any treatments. How marvellous that some trusts do offer a range of different things.

@ThePure he was literally a community phsychiatrist. But he seemed dodgy. He told me I couldn't have PTSD over something I hadn't witnessed (my father's death) but didn't ask me about all the other traumas I have PTSD from. I think I kind of clammed up and got quite upset with him tbh. Maybe it was partly my own fault but I really didn't trust him!

I had a mental breakdown and was sectioned. But it shouldn't have to come to that! Have you mentioned your suicidal ideation?

That sounds similar to my experience … where I live if you see a psychiatrist when you’re in crisis they won’t diagnose you with anything , they wait til you stabilise somewhat then say there’s nothing specifically wrong with you, just vague things such as “low mood” and suicidality, childhood adversity. They focus on the wrong events for my CPTSD, there’s loads of traumatic events I’ve been through that aren’t in my medical notes yet they focus on things that don’t affect me and dismiss the things that have actually had a huge affect on me.
Also to the OP, I wouldn’t pursue a diagnosis of BPD, the stigma will follow you forever.