Has Therapy/Counselling helped you and if so how?

[Anon3837]

Also, did you feel a slight difference or weight lifted quite quickly or did it take time? Was it worse before it got better?

Thanks

Hello,

yes it helped me to understand more about who I am and why I react to situations in the way I do. I can't say I am happier necessarily but I am making more conscious choices x

I've had a lot of therapy over the years. Some has been relatively ineffective but some has given me huge 'ah ha' moments that led to huge personal growth.

What I've realised is that you need to 'click' with a counsellor / therapist. The times any therapy has been ineffective, has been when I've felt very 'meh' about them. I wish I hadn't ignored that and had just moved on to find someone else.

Even with the 'ah ha' moments, I have always felt worse before I've felt better. But because I know that's part of process (for me at least) I don't panic when I feel worse, I just ride it out and work through it and come out the other side better for it.

I think therapy works if you're open to looking inwards and facing some home truths about yourself and possibly others you're close to. It can be uncomfortable and it can feel scary, but a good therapist will support you through that. I don't think it provides much growth or healing if it's just been used as an outlet for trauma and emotions or if someone is going in the hopes of seeking validation.

So for me, the right therapist and the right mindset are the key to success.

Yes hugely in different ways. I had CBT to start with and found some of the insights revelationary such as learning I can't mind read and am not responsible for how people feel.

I've since had lots of different types of therapy, mainly psychodynamic some of which I found helpful as a reflective aid. I've had group therapy which was badly run but helped me understand some of my behaviour in groups.

I've done several mindfulness courses which I found useful. I've also found therapy helpful in order to gauge if my responses to situations were normal.

I've had some awful therapy which I stayed in too long so pull out quickly if it's not working for you.

Totally agree that in my experience and view, you have to be prepared to look inwards and at those close to you. This can take a long time. It can take a very long time to see what we do in life and in relationships with other people and how that happened. Understanding it is so transforming but can be very painful and hard to accept.

Overall, happier, I'd say no. Able to make better choices , decisions and process feelings and suffering in a way I never imagined I'd be able to - yes definitely.

I absolutely love couples therapy on BBC I player. She explains this all quite well. The people always go in there focusing and directing all energy and hope for change on their partners, not realising that all the answers come when you look within. When you get it, that makes complete sense.

I totally agree with @GreenGrass28 about the 'click' I had counselling after a bad marriage break up. It was good in that it gave me a place to vent and it helped me to feel less responsible for things that were outside my control. However, I felt like I never really clicked with my counsellor and I stopped after 8 sessions as I felt like it was just an expensive chat.

I would like to have counselling again now that I'm farther down the road after the breakup. I'm looking into counsellors but it's very difficult to pick one based on just websites. It's a pity it's not talked about more. I'm sure that some people I know must have had counselling but it doesn't come up in casual conversation.

After 30 years of on off therapy things began to improve.
If you have suffered from cptsd then you have to be in it for the long haul.

I've had therapy about 3 times a year for about a decade and it's been transformative for me. I grew up thinking that it was my job to solve everybody's problems while making sure that they got the credit. It was grinding my down to the point where I was constantly ill and people were comfortable with laughing out loud about how useless and rubbish I was.

After a lot of chat with a therapist I started recognising what I needed and asking the people round about me to take responsiblity for their own needs so I could look after my own. It's really made a huge difference to my life.

I think the attitudes that I had, had been learned from previous generations of my family. The same patterns has been going on for generations, so I hope that the work I've done will benefit future generations too.

I would be glad to know more about that. My DS has cPTSD from surgery in infancy, and I would like to know how to help him.

Psychotherapy helped me the most but I dedicated my whole life to trying to understand myself through reading and meditation.
There are also specific trauma therapists and if it was a one off cause as you suggest then EMDR might work in a much shorter timeframe. Good luck.