Help me start to help myself?

[Stripyseason]

History of anxiety and lately depression.
carer to my mum and my son.
i am constantly exhausted, by the time I’ve got my son off to school onto bus and settled my mum if she’s at home not at the centre I make all these plans to wash/
tidy/ cook/ post office etc, all the stuff I used to do, but I don’t. I barely make it to boil a kettle for a cup of tea and crawl under the covers and sleep/ watch tv until I drag myself out to look less witch like for my son coming home, it’s such a bad pattern I’m in but I can’t help it.
im on citalopram and diazepam for sleep. I can’t stop comfort eating and am piling on weight, but I literally can’t seem to stop myself.
10 years ago I ran everyday, was fit and happy and somehow somewhere it all got bad, slowly and I’m now at the point I try not to look at a mirror as don’t even recognise myself.

Make a list of everything you would like to get done then choose one thing to start with.
It could be to walk the long way to school pick up. Start small. Do this every day for a week and add something extra for the next week,
Don't beat yourself up if you don't manage it. Re set and try again.

Are you on enough citalopram yet?

Probably not, gp is slowly slowly titrating me up. So far all it’s done is make me horribly horribly hungry ☹️☹️

Carers assessment from social services for your needs, you need respite care for mum while you sort your health out. It might also be time, in the long run, for mum to have designated carers come in several times a day rather than you doing it all, so book a care needs assessment for your mum too.
.
Can you afford to outsource any of the chores temporarily? Cleaner, service wash at launderette, pre-made healthy meals delivered? You need a break, you sound like the underlying cause for the other health issues is you are burned out.

Caring is the hardest job in the world. You can't do it unless you look after yourself first. Your son should be your priority over your mother - he needs his mum in a good mental place.
I had to take Sertraline to control the absolute rage I felt at the years I was expected to become a carer without being asked whether I felt comfortable about it (it was very intense in our case).