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Mental health

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Need help

2 replies

LilyLily1999 · 16/09/2024 18:04

Hi all…really unsure what to do and need some friendly advice or just someone to listen please no judgement.

Im 24, I was in an abusive relationship for 2 years, it ended in May, was abusive in many ways…one of them being financially and the guy still owes me £2000. Since leaving the relationship ive been left with a load of debt for things such as council tax £1500, water bill £800, rent £300 and credit apps like paypal etc as i was never able to pay them before since most my money was going to my ex partner. I have bad mental health (previously tried to take my life) and the constant worry of trying to pay of the debt when not working and soley on universal credit and pip is getting too much for me…i know it’ll take time but im losing the plot and struggling to stay hopeful i feel like something needs to change or im gonna lose it, I cant live like this. One of the main things thats triggering me to feel so depressed is i lost my car not long after the end of my abusive relationship as it had a lot of problems that weren't worth fixing so since then ive not really been out the house as im too anxious and paranoid to use public transport and walk into town which is fairly far from my house, you can imagine the impact its having on my mental health being home alone all the time with basically no support or friends, i feel like im going crazy, ive lost my freedom and bit of independence. I was considering applying for car finance however places ive spoken to have said i need to pay my debt of first (understandable and best thing to do) but im honestly struggling so much without a car, having one wont cure my mental health but it'll definitely make me a lot happier and less suicidal. I feel like im taking steps back in life rather then progressing. I have £3000 in savings, I really dont wanna spend it all as then the only money ill have to my name is the money i recieve when paid and its nice to have savings on the side just in case…but i was thinking to use it to pay as much debt as i can and then hopefully ill get accepted for car finance.

Dont know what im expecting people to respond to this just dont have a support system and im struggling mentally and not having a car after driving for 4 years is really taking a toll on me to the point ive started doing reckless things like drinking and smoking which i dont usually do.

OP posts:
Eyesopenwideawake · 16/09/2024 18:16

Just a thought but if you start walking into town that will help you mental health (being outdoors is proven to be good for you), and will take your mind off smoking and drinking, both of which are bad for your health and pocket.

Mrsttcno1 · 16/09/2024 19:06

Is there anyone at all who you can reach out to for some support in real life OP?

With regards to the car, I think you need to accept that isn’t in your immediate future plans and find a work around. As previous poster suggested the walk might do you good, but when not working, with debt, a car can be a massive financial drain. Anything can go wrong and when it does it’s typically expensive to fix. You also need to bare in mind that even if you pay off the debts you won’t immediately be able to get a finance as it takes time for your credit score to recover, and unless you want to pay £££ for a car you’d need some money to put down as a deposit. It’s simply not affordable for you to buy and run a car at the moment, but you should still try and get out and about, even if it starts as a walk round the block and build up from there.

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