I'll try and condense 10 years here...I was a mentally well person in a teaching job and then some terrible things happened in the school I worked at which coincided with terrible things happening in my personal life.
I couldn't cope with my job and left it for an admin role. I began to feel better but then eventually realised that changing job wasn't enough to fix me and went on a low dose of sertraline. I felt so much better. So much so that I went back into teaching, loved it and agreed to take on more responsibility. I felt so well that I decided to come off sertraline - a mistake. One Ofsted inspection later and I was back on sertraline and eventually left that job to focus on my kids.
I've been lucky enough to be able to survive on a low paid role. I'm not on sertraline now. I've just started a new teaching role as I need more money. The school is lovely, the workload is intense but manageable but the horrible anxious thoughts are back. I don't sleep well, my stomach is in knots. I'm worried about crying at work. It is all so irrational as the team do genuinely seem lovely. It's just I have seem the very worst of people in my previous role. I think the feeling of constantly being monitored messes with my head.
Do I go back to my GP and ask for sertraline again? Does it matter to be on it long term? I've never been offered talking therapy but I know I can self refer. Has anyone found that helpful? I clearly have issues relating to my work. I try to do the right things for my mental health. I would say I'm a more anxious person in everyday life than I used to be but I find I can manage most things. Just not work. I really don't know the right way forward.
Thanks for reading