CPTSD - does it ever fully go away?

[SofiaJessica4]

I have recently been working with my therapist on CPTSD from childhood and would appreciate some input from anyone else dealing with this.

As a child I was neglected / was in an emotionally abusive household.

CPTSD has come up for me in the context of my last relationship with a partner I've now left for other reasons.

We were a 'blended' family - he has 2 kids (7 and 11) and I found CPTSD from childhood was coming up in respect of perceived neglect by him and BM.

During the relationship I was working with my therapist on this and still am. I would react quite strongly to certain situations with the kids. For example his daughter desperately needed a haircut and my ex refused to get one as he didn't want to spend the money - which he had. It freaked me out more than 'normal'.

My therapist said CPTSD doesn't just go away, it's just a case of managing your triggers. Do people agree? I felt I was doing this - I'd emotionally take care of myself at these times and did not lash out.

I've heard things like EMDR could help remove the trauma/the trigger but that seems unlikely? I feel deep trauma is something that may always be there and sometimes certain situations are just not good for us OR we just have to manage our response.

There were other more serious things. SD had a chest infection for over a year which wasn't treated and both parents preferred to argue than actually make sure she got better. I'm talking all night coughing, at various points a fever, a rattly chest, the works. Once BM refused to give her the antibiotics prescribed by our GP. I was really worried about her but also constantly sick catching what she had for 6 months to the point I missed work. Once I put my foot down and my ex took her to the resident parents doctor and didn't allow the GP to dismiss him, he got antihistamines, which helped her body recover. Such a small thing but without it who knows when she'd have recovered.

I think anyone would find that situation stressful but it made me feel really unsafe and it was constantly on my mind that my ex wouldn't do what needed to be done for his daughter. I felt desperate to fix the situation but of course I had no rights and it wasn't my place. It was really hard to watch.

I am avoiding men with kids for the time being given all of this. I'm also considering somatic therapy and want to think about whether childhood trauma has come up in other facets of life, but I believe it's mostly been within the context of this relationship

Would really appreciate people's input

I was diagnosed with C-PTSD eighteen months ago at an confirmation appointment for something else and it came as a huge shock to me even thought my whole childhood was one of neglect, abuse, moving around and with zero stability. I then had trauma in my marriage. I am having incredible therapy at the moment and I could ask her if you'd like me to, but my feelings is no it won't go, it is part of our history and it will always be there but we get better at living with it.

It won’t fully go away, however you learn to manage your triggers and start being able to live a normal life.

I had emdr for cptsd and ptsd. It hasn't cured it but made it easier. I'd definitely recommend emdr. It's hard and at times I got worse. I also found at times I thought it was pointless, then something just clicked, it was definitely a roller coaster of emotion. My therapist said emdr works more effectively for recent trauma but actually makes a big enough difference for cptsd to that its worth while. I had the treatment on the nhs (very long waiting list) but was worth it.

It doesn’t ‘go away’ in the sense of you forgetting about what happened to you but the emotional attachment can be broken, so that you can view the past with the understanding of an adult and without distress.

I had EMDR about five years ago for trauma that was 38 years ago and it worked perfectly for me. It was hard work and upsetting at times but worth it.