Walking on eggshells with sister

[Preston21]

I’m planning a family vacation with my partner and teenage son. I invited my sister and her husband as we both get on well as couples. There was an extra bed in the villa so we said to my mum to come along for a few days. I did not invite my younger sister as the last time we went away there were several arguments and I didn’t enjoy the holiday. She was also rude to my mum and is the same with my mum at home. She clashes with my other sister too.

She recently moved into s new home and in all honesty she wouldn’t be able to afford to come anyway.

I told my sister that we were going but didn’t tell her my mum was as she kicked off big time saying we always leave her out. I do more things with my other sister as we enjoy each others company and see her more.

We just told her mum was coming and she is not speaking to us. She said we should of taken her son instead - my nephew is 16 and we took him on a family last year as she couldn’t make it as she had booked a holiday already that clashed with the dates and he said he would rather come with us. I don’t think I should be obliged to take my nephew ( I love my nephew to bits) and I wanted to do something nice with my mum.

I love my sister but in all honesty I don’t enjoy her company most of the time as she suffers from bad mental health. I support her with most things if she needs me but I also work 2 jobs, often 60 hours a week and I just wanted a stress free vacation.

I now feel I can’t go on holiday without inviting her or do I just not go with my other sister in future to keep the peace.

I certainly wouldn't invite her as unfortunately she sounds like a nightmare. Holidays are for relaxation, not stress caused by family members who don't know how to behave.

FWIW I can see no reason either why you should feel obliged to invite your nephew rather than your mum.

I hope it settles down somehow, and that you can actually enjoy it.

Ignore her and do what you want.

If she had a better attitude her son and/or herself might have found themselves invited. She needs to learn the consequences of how she treats people.

I sympathise. I have a bit of a similar situation with my sister. She is very temperamental and speaks her mind. Often causing tension.
Perhaps you could try to explain to her that S you argued last time, you thought she might not want to come?
No, it's not that simple. You might just have to invite her some if the time. I don't have the answers but looking to read some replies to help my situation.
Sending empathy