how did i forget?

[thursdaymurderclub]

ive had surgery today, and whilst doing thier pre-op stuff the constulant left my medical records by my bed..

i was curious to know if any of my actual birth details were in there as i know nothing about my actual birth, i.e weight, time etc

the very first page of my records was dated 1996 and a letter from my GP stated that i was 9 weeks pregnant and that a lump had been found in my right breast.

now i know i had a lump removed from my rest breat in about 2010/2011 which was deemed benign ...

my first child was born in 1998?

i'm 57 years old.. i know i have PTSD and i know i am diagnosed with disassociative amneasia.. but thats from childhood trauma!

i clearly have 2 children... and have no recollection of losing a child at that time, although i know i lost a child in 2002, that was the reason for my dip into clinical depression..

i dont really know what i am asking.. im just shocked

Not saying this has happened to you, but I recently requested a copy of my medical notes and there was stuff on there that I'm certain wasn't for me.
Surely it's unlikely you'd forget your first pregnancy? X

the referral letter was definately from my dr's surgery.. the year was 1 year after my now ex and i met. alas he passed away last year so i cannot ask him.

i feel so bad that potentially i have forgotten my 1st pregnancy and i can only assume a miscarriage as i'm certain i would not have terminated!

i'm very confused now

In those days 9 weeks may not have been noticed by you - you might have realised you were a bit late or it might have skipped unnoticed if you had other worries

Pre 12 weeks no one used to bother - you weren't really pregnant until 12 weeks

what the pp said. When i had an mc my mother said you didnt know that early when she was my age. With early mc you were just deemed late.

but how did they know i and didn't? surely i must have gone to the GP about said lump? and i do have a very vague recollection of a lump... we are talking 28 years ago!

sadly i didn't have enough time to have a proper good look at the records as the HCA came back tutting about the consultants mistake and took them away?

I agree that your notes could be wrong. I once had to convince a psychiatrist that I really didn’t have children despite my notes saying I did.

I think I am inclined to agree that there must be a mix up of notes... i know i've had my issues with the MH rollercoaster over the years, but i'm 99% confident i would know if i had been pregnant! i know in that first year with my then partner, i was relatively well until i had my DD in 1998 and thats when things began to go wrong for me again.

You can ask for a copy of your notes, then you can read them all carefully and see if anything rings a bell.

You are allowed full access to your notes, they aren't kept secret from you. Also I think maybe a mistake.

i have already had my full notes, i applied last year to assist with a pip application, but found parts to be missing, so i assume different departments were missed off... i've never seen this letter before! all the notes i have had only date back to 1998 when my DD was born, i assume they don't keep older notes sadly

Hospitals only have to keep records for 25 years.
I discovered an error on my birth certificate when I was 26 and would have needed my maternity notes from when I was born to correct but unfortunately they had already been destroyed.

Did you find out anything about your own birth?

sadly no! i do have my birth certificate but thats all i have... i did know my parents but mum passed when i was 16 and my dad passed many years ago too and i realised there are zero baby photos of me!

i think the earliest photo i have ever seen is when i'm maybe 11 or 12? i don't think there is anything untoward about my birth or family.. but as my DD has just had a baby i was curious to know my birth weight etc..