So, so low

[2005howareyou]

Think I just found a way through another thread to post. So here goes hope this cut/paste thing works.

Anyone feeling helpless and low?

From the Lighting a Candle for South East Asia thread.

I am sitting here feeling so low and so alone but I know that there are a lot worse off than me so it is giving me a glimmer of hope to get through the next few days, weeks, months and maybe the year. My life changed in 2005 forever and will never be the same again, but I my New Years Resolution is to look after myself, my husband and children as best I can because they are the most wonderful people I know. I will pray for those who have hurt me so deeply and too look out for all those less fortunate than me. And I am going back to COUNSELLING because I have to help myself to keep me sane and look after those I love most. I know that this is a bit off for this thread but just found it and felt this was the right place for me to mention my feelings. Have tried over the last few days to post a new thread but couldn't bring myself to do it.

Bunglie - here is to all lost souls near and far.
XXX

Youre not alone now, there are many people here to listen, advise and try and help in anyway they can, the first step is posting about how you feel, well done for taking that first step.

You sound a loving and caring person, if I can't help or advise you, I am here to listen. x

Thanks Golds - it goes back so many years that I wouldn't know where to start - anyone else out there with alcoholic parents who pop pills to be sure to be sure?

Have to pop for a bit - DS1 calling me to play a game - I love them so much and hope they never experience what I have and that my wonderful husband and I are still together when they have their own kids - wrote him a Thank You note last night just for being him and for being my rock and my strength over the last number of years. I am proud to say that I love my husband very much and hope it never changes.

It is others who have hurt me and the pain runs very deep and I hate showing it all the time.

Talk soon.

back for a few mo's - anyone?????

Hiya, I know what you are going through feeling low, been having a bad couple of days, but think it could be post christmas blues.

Played a game with the kids - now DS is roaring because he has to go to bed!!!!!!!!! I want to go too! Know I won't sleep but at least I can close my eyes for a while.

How do you know if you are having panic attacks? Am sure mine are attacks but can't be sure.

No bubbles - this has been going for a long, long time - thought it was sorted during the year but it has reared it's ugly, ugly, UGLY, head again!!!!!!! Feel so p**d off

I haven;t had one for a while touch wood since I've been taking my ad's regularly, but i always know because my lips go numb, I get pins and needles in my hands and find it hard to catch my breath, but, I think it differs with all people.

Bubbles - mine is waking up in a total panic usually after a dream and not being able to sleep again

That must be horrible, every so often I have trouble sleeping, but that is because I have so many things going through my mind that its all one rush, I usually get over that by using a hypnosis tapes for a couple of nights and I get back to normal for a few nights, my trouble is that I don't have time to relax, feeling better now though as dh ran me a bath earlier, with bath oil and candles so I had a lovely soak.

2005howareyou, are you still there?

Sounds fab - you seem to have a hubby like mine. Enjoy - going for a bit again - had a phonecall a few mins ago so don't feel great again - I need some quiet time. Thanks Golds and Bubbles

Have to remember the people on here who have been good to me!!!

I just want life to change - does that sound selfish, even if I push some people aside that keep dragging my down but whom I should love?

Does that make sense?

No it doesnt sound selfish, I pushed away people who I used to love because they kept dragging me down and making me feel worthless, it was so so hard, but i HAD to do it for my health and the sake of my marriage and now don't regret it for one second.

If you want to talk, you know where I am.

Thanks Bubbles - might bump it up later - but I have always bottled things up inside - I know it is wrong but I don't know any different - I just want a "normal" life - whatever that is??????????

BTW - have I spoken to you before - have changed my name a few times depending on my mood or how much I trust people! PATHETIC!! or what

To be honest, I don't think there is such a word as normal, mainly becuase all different people have different ideas of what normal, what one person considers normal another one doesn't.

Take care.

No you haven't spoken to me before, I was dizzylizzy until a couple of days ago and have now chosen this because of my fave programme.

Beleive me though I THINK i know what you are going through.

Talk soon - signing off XXX

The reason I say think is becuase situations are different, but I can understand having to push people away that you love.

Hey bubbles - your vanilla schnapes sounds nice - any jugfuls

On its way my dear, if you don;t mind, could you tell me a couple of your names you used on mumsnet, a stupid question, was bunglie one of them

Hiya, sorry I sloped off last night got distracted by kids and dh saying 'are you on that thing again' How are you feeling today ?

I have been feeling very low recently, my worries are due to financial worries and feeling very lonely, the time of the year doesn't help either, can't wait till Wednesday, kids back at school and a real opportunity for me to get on the phone and sort myself out a job thus hopefully solving some of the above.

In the middle of cooking tea, so may not return for a while just wanted to see if you were OK