(Trigger warning) How to explain self harm scars to DC

[scarecrow22]

DD (13) has twice recently asked me why I have so many scars on my arms. There are a lot.

I can't avoid this subject much longer but want to do it right: as well as DD I have a DS (11y).

Thank you in advance.

'i went through times of great anguish in my life, and ways to cope with this were very limited to me at the time. I hurt myself when I was feeling very bad. Now I have the right tools to help manage my feelings inside if I ever feel anywhere near that bad again, and I know I'm safe and happy now" and then use this as a chance to teach them all of those tools 💕

It's very positive that you want to be straight with them about it. There should be no shame in the after affects of self harm, it is part of some of our lives and it is testament to the strength to overcome those dark days enough to keep going. It's a sign of renewed strength in you. I would let them ask any questions, and answer them honestly alongside teaching them how to deal with the situation of they ever find themselves there.
And be prepared for them to already know what the scars are from, but that they just needed to hear that you are ok and will be in future, kids are aware of all sorts 💕

Thank you @QueensOfTheVolksAge - a good basis for a script, and wise advice. I agree DD probably knows as she's at secondary school. I'm ashamed that I did the cutting when they were younger, but I think I can explain that they were very much not the cause.

I so appreciate you taking the time to reply and being so thoughtful.