Severe Anxiety

[Imfallingapartx]

I’m not sure why I’m posting this really. I suppose I just need somewhere to get it all out. I’ve always been an anxious person with a tendency to catastrophise but the anxiety has got steadily worse over the last year due to a family bereavement and the fact I was sexually assaulted.

Last month I bought my first home with some inheritance from the family bereavement and help from a parent. I love my house and I’m incredibly grateful to be on the property ladder however this massively increased my anxiety and I worry constantly about the house setting on fire, a flood (basically anything that would destroy the house!) because I feel a huge amount of pressure due to buying the house with an inheritance and gifted money.

Typically, Not helping my anxiety at all, last week I had a small kitchen fire. Obviously this has totally heightened everything and now I’m even more hyper aware of the slightest sound or smell that could indicate something is wrong. In addition to the small kitchen fire and completely unrelated, my gas hob set off the carbon monoxide alarm last night so all the gas has been capped until the housing developer can replace the hob. I think these 2 events were the straw that broke the camels back. After the fire I bought WiFi cameras to put around the house so I could check in when I’m at work and put my mind at rest except now I worry the cameras will cause a fire and it seems anytime I do anything to try and mitigate the anxiety my brain somehow finds a way to make it worse

I’m just so sad. All of the time. And the anxiety is constant day and night 24/7. I don’t even get a reprieve when I finally doze off to sleep at night because then I have horrible vivid nightmares and wake up even more panicky and exhausted. I can’t function at all and my work performance is slipping because I can barely concentrate and I aside from that I feel psychically sick. I’m shaking all the time, I feel queasy, dizzy, have a banging headache and my chest feels so heavy.

My gp is currently in the process of switching my meds which isn’t helping because I can’t really find anything that helps at all. I just don’t want to feel like this anymore, I want to be normal and happy and not worry every time I leave the house and get a goods night sleep and go out with friends and not feel like I’m drowning and in pain all of the time.

It just feels like it won’t ever get any better

If you have been SA and have had a fire then your body is understandably anxious.

I had similar circumstances (not SA) and I found that setting up circumstances where I felt safe helped. For me this was in my garden with all the doors locked.

I would sit and say to myself - I am safe, I am safe.

Over time the anxiety diminished.

I did find therapy helped.

I'm really sorry you are going through this. I too suffer with anxiety.

Have you tried cognitive behavioural therapy? I done a course through the NHS, it was over the phone and it really helped me to discover techniques that work for me.
You might be able to self refer for this if you Google the mental health services in your area. There may even be private services if you can afford it.

The things that worked for me, was doing things consciously. Like instead of automatically locking the door, I'd think to myself, I am locking the door now. I also learnt breathing techniques.

Best of luck 🤞

Sound like me and I have OCD

I could have written this post myself OP, I have OCD and severe anxiety also with a tendency to catastrophize. The art of distraction is the answer for me. I keep myself so busy that I don't have time to worry anymore. I find through our the day I can manage but when I finally sit down the worries and thoughts come. I did a few rounds of CBT on the NHS and sadly didn't help me. I begged my GP to refer me on and I got refered to CMHT and am now going to be referred for step 4 treatment which will hopefully help. You haver deepest sympathy as it's truly awful.