Please or to access all these features

Mental health

Mumsnet hasn't checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have medical concerns, please seek medical attention.

Feel Worried for DD 19

4 replies

Max28W · 14/03/2024 17:17

DD had an awful time in her teenage years due to mental health issues and possibly ADHD. She has anxiety and persistent depression and has also got into some controlling relationships, having to go to court in June being made to testify against a guy with a number of charges - so now we add PTSD in the mix. I just feel so bad for my beautiful girl. My mother had mental health issues all her life and so do other members of my family , my husband suffers from low level depression I wonder if it would have been kinder to her if we'd have never had her? I feel like we have set her up for a life of misery due to her inheriting issues from both sides. She has recently started Sertraline and seemed to be getting better , had a nice BF who promptly dumped her on his Mum's advice after an episode of psychosis. She has taken this really to heart.

She is trying to be independent and living away at uni ( not far) submitting her work but how much more can life throw at the poor girl? She has a lovely PT job working with SEN children and wants to be a Teacher - it makes her vibrant and thrive working with them. I'm just so worried that will never happen for her.

I'm tired and emotional and perhaps catastrophising - i'm there for her the early hours of the morning when she has bad dreams and moments of anxiety. She is seeing all the medical professionals and counsellors she can at the moment but has also recently disclose that she has Health anxiety to me.

I'm just so worried. I just want to know if there is another side or she will have to cope with this forever.

OP posts:
blackrabbitwhiterabbit · 14/03/2024 17:20

All I can say is that you sound like an absolutely lovely mum. I had to hide my severe depression and suicidal thoughts from my mum throughout my teens as she didn't believe depression was a thing, and certainly not something she wanted to acknowledge. Your daughter is lucky to have you.

Hattie98 · 14/03/2024 17:43

I have kids with MH issues as well, and in my darker moments I wonder the same as you. So I do get where you're coming from. But your daughter has got so much going for her; she has got a job (already!) in a field that she loves and wants to pursue, she is living independently away from home, she is engaging with professionals and appropriate medication, and she has a wonderful supportive parent in you.

ALL of these things are really huge. Honestly, I know there may be bumps in the road ahead but she is very much on the right track to have a happy life.

mirror245 · 14/03/2024 18:53

I think you said it yourself- you're catastrophising lots of things. Your dd has had a difficult time but she's showing great resilience being at uni, working a part time and meaningful job.

Could you have her assessed for ADHD. Anxiety and depression are often key indicators (or misdiagnosed) for adhd. Her uni might be able to help and she might be eligible for DSA which might help her with her studies.

Max28W · 14/03/2024 23:17

Thanks all,

She has a psychiatric appointment next week, she's at one of the best Unis there is for student support (having transferred from a disinterested highly regarded one). She is so independent and another symptom is that she is demand avoidant too. I tread softly with her and or she hides things 😞. Hopefully we will get more answers soon, ADHD runs on my side of the family too.

I just feel like she's not even 20 and it's a lot.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page