Anyone available for a handhold tonight?

[Nogodsnomasters]

I have severe health anxiety, my son has been slightly unwell for a few days but this afternoon/Evening it has got marginally worse, I will be calling the GP in the morning but my anxiety is spiralling and I'm worried sick about him and I'm not going to get a single wink of sleep tonight - I've got him in bed with me and I'm watching him like a hawk. I'm shaking like a leaf and panicking at every movement he makes. My husband is here but went to sleep an hour ago as he needs to work tomorrow.

Sorry to hear you are in that head space.
I don't have personal advice to offer, but I can recommend this to listen to...
https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/m001w0z9?partner=uk.co.bbc&origin=share-mobile
Really interesting generally and also touches on the topic of anxiety from a novel angle (to me at least) which might be helpful, also passes the time well if you are going to struggle to sleep.

Thank you for replying. Good to know someone is here.

You're not alone.
Many people not sleeping right now for various reasons. Some are watching over people they love like you. Those loved ones are lucky to have someone taking care of them and loving them. Getting ill is part of life and watchful care is all you need to do. If things change you can change your response. But meanwhile try to keep a steady state. You'll get through.

I feel that way sometimes too. I bought a book recently called something like Anxiety is my Superpower, it has helped me to process when I feel ill with restless thoughts etc. Despite you feeling ill, your brain is actually doing a marvellous thing and it means that you can afford to relax slightly. You are in a far safer space than one of ignorance.

Hope this helps a bit. You are doing an amazing job and it is in your best interests to try to relax a bit. Thinking of you xx

That's a lovely way to put it and very kind of you, thank you.

My sleep has been awful for months due to anxiety. I discovered this the other day and it seems to help www.instagram.com/reel/C3ImzEVOV59/?igsh=MW8zYmxsN3FldndyYQ==

Rain music always calms me down. You are not alone OP. You and your DS are safe tonight. If you have concerns about him you can wake your husband and take him to the nearest hospital if you need to.
Tonight thousands of nurses, doctors, pharmacists, radiographers and ancillary staff will be working all night to keep us all safe.

Hi OP, I became like this with my children. I don’t specifically have health related anxiety, my anxiety comes and goes and the focus changes, but for a time it was completely focussed on my children.

I managed to stop the health/child anxiety by telling myself that if I didn’t then my children would grow up with the same anxiety over their health that I had, and I just couldn’t be responsible for that.

I also saw a lovely GP who totally got it and he turned it around for me and said to welcome minor illnesses as thats what protects them from the bigger stuff by building their immunity.

This isn’t to make you feel bad, and I do know how hard it is. I had to really work at it, and I think it was easier when they started school and I could no longer be in such control of their lives.

I’m sure your darling boy will be fine, I know how precious they are, and it’s only because you love him so much.

This is what frightens me because we have another child here so one of us would need to stay and the other go but I'm the only one who drives so it's practically easier for me to go but as part n parcel of my health anxiety I have a massive phobia of hospitals and medical situations so I know if that happens I would progress to full blown panic attacks. So this is worst case scenario for me.

Thank you for the recommendations.
OP, I hope you find some rest through the night x

I think I managed to fall asleep around 2am and have been up from 6.15. I am so anxious I'm sweating and my heart rate is 110 on my smart watch and I haven't even got out of bed yet, I'm dreading what the day will bring.

Right, so you’ve had 4 hours of sleep! Your original post said you wouldn’t get a wink of sleep, so much better than that. How is your DS?

That's true, I guess 4hrs is better than zero. He's still sleeping beside me so I can't really access the situation yet. I'll be ringing the GP as soon as they open at 8.30