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Mental health

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I'm struggling

3 replies

Louise498 · 15/02/2024 22:55

Hi everyone,

My back story.

Around 3 years ago, our son started to experience bullying at school - this was by 3 of his friends. We've never been able to understand exactly why, it started to happen literally overnight. The bullying, to an extent, has now stopped, but our son has been left with very few friends and known as a "weirdo" at school.

I think its more our son is now classed as "unpopular" so kids are unpopular if they hang around him sort of situation.

School weren't great, but have told us they "are aware there's an issue, but our son isn't breaking their behaviour policy". However, the parents of the mums involved (after I foolishly tried to have a chat about it) spread around that our son is the issue, even calling him a jealous weirdo.

They've said truly awful things about my family, and, as they are popular mums, they've basically brought in other parents to their hatred. I've essentially been bullied by these women too.
I'm a grown woman whose been picked on, pathetic right?

Some days I've been able to deal with it, working helps, but in the evenings, like now, I'll find myself thinking about what on earth has happened. I hate what they've done to my son, he's a different kid completely.

I also hate what it's done to me, I'm a different person completely too. I used to be happy, adventurous and now I find myself driving miles out of my way just to go to a shop I know im unlikely to see anyone in. I have hardly anything to do with school now - I actually experience huge anxiety at the thought of going near the place.

I'll have moments where I feel like scum, as that's what we've been called. I self hate to an extreme and wish I could be anyone but me. I feel genuinely broken about what's happened and I can't seem to get past it. I get really grumpy and snappy, or I cry uncontrollably.

I wish our son would be allocated a different high school to these boys in September, but the liklihood is, catchment wise, he will. I feel full of dread at the thought of this and wish we could move away so he could Start his next part of schooling away from this. (Selfishly, for my own mental health too).

This is a short snipet of whats been happening and I don't know why I've come here and written all this really. I just wanted to share how I feel, maybe let others know you're not alone if you're struggling - things will get better right??

OP posts:
Moier · 15/02/2024 23:17

Is it a possibility you could move away as a family?
If it was my son he wouldn't be going to school.
Both my daughters were bullied and l took them out.. they got work sent home.
My Grandkids are all home educated because schools these days are awful for mental health.
( They are all ASD).

Suzi9989 · 15/02/2024 23:26

Change school, your son has raised these kids are bullying him and not a lot is being done by the school. This will either be a ticking time bomb for him to eventually break policy or will cause long-term trauma.

Speak to the school pastoral care, school needs to do more to support both of you. Please speak to your GP for your own mental health.

hamsterswhiskers · 15/02/2024 23:39

OP this thread has made me so sad for you and your son. Have you talked to him about trying to get him in to another school if that's what you both feel is the way forward? Please consider some counselling to help you cope with this awful situation. Sending a hug OP

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