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Daughter self-harming

18 replies

NeedAdvice2024 · 22/01/2024 23:22

I was absolutely devastated to discover recently that my 13 year old daughter has started self-harming. I believe it's a relatively new situation and we have a doctor's appointment this afternoon with her to discuss and get her help. I just don't really know what to expect from this point, can anyone with experience in this please advise? Aside from getting her counselling, what happens with school etc? Do social services get involved? Is this the start of years of involvement from various agencies to ensure her well-being?
She's worried now that this will blow up much bigger than she imagined, I don't think she realised how serious it is. I don't think she'll welcome regular counselling, checkups, etc. but I know we have to do whatever it takes to keep her safe.
If anyone can give me an idea of what to expect I'd be very grateful, I feel sick.

OP posts:
Scutterbug · 22/01/2024 23:27

My son started self harming at a similar age. He also had other MH issues and didn’t attend school. He was referred to CAMHS who were useless tbh. We weren’t referred to social services until he was older and tried to take his life. Even then we just got a call and then the case was closed. Good luck, it’s so stressful but a good thing that you know x

NeedAdvice2024 · 22/01/2024 23:37

Thanks Scutterbug, I hope your son is doing better now x

OP posts:
Carsarelife · 22/01/2024 23:38

My daughter self harmed between 14-16 years. School wasn't much help, referrals to various talking therapy etc
18 now and no more self harm thankfully.
Therapist said she thinks she may have autism but I don't think so and no one has ever suggested this in all these years. Even at school this wasn't suggested. I still don't think she has

Anxhor · 22/01/2024 23:46

DD started this and didn't really want to talk about it

We did talk about it though

I immediately arranged for her to change school and it stopped

Luckily after contacting the new school directly and the LEA she was out in a couple of weeks

Despite the fact she'd already started her GCSEs I made the very swift decision to not piss around, be her mum and get her out asap

Best decision I made

It was school related

Schools can't do anything and neither can CAHMS really

Anxhor · 22/01/2024 23:48

I didn't bother with the GP

I just needed to remove her from the situation

Moier · 22/01/2024 23:52

My daughter was 14 when she started SH.. they had uniform inspection at school and teacher noticed it.. l honestly had no idea.. and we were and still are very close.. turns out she was being bullied.. l took her out of school and got her into another.. took her to the GP.. she went to CAHMS ( useless).. we talked and got closer.. other things came out about her Dad etc.. .she seemed to be enjoying her new school..but still had on going MH problems.. but she kept loads of things to herself.. she seemed too old for school once she turned 15.. too mature .. her older sister is eight years older and they were more like twins.. anyhow the school and us decided she didn't have to go back to school and they sent her work home.. she did her GCSE's and gained 8 ..
She started work with my Sister and enjoyed it.. but now and again she would still SH.. but kept it hidden..( always when in the bath).. she slept with me until age 18.. Well went to bed ..but l always woke up with her asleep at side of me.
At 17 she was able to have adult counselling.. it helped her to stop SH.. plus she started going clubbing and wanting to wear clothes that would show more marks.. ( she worked in a restaurant so would often burn herself by accident.. the marks were similar to the SH marks so no one was the wiser.
She seemed to stop the SH.. but she still had awful MH problems...
She got married and had a son.. seemed very happy.. .
But still with MH problems.. the SH came back.. along with her realising she was Gay.. her husband was upset but understanding and they divorced.. Co parenting..
She's been with her partner for the last year and after coming out the SH has stopped and her MH improved so much.

Anxhor · 23/01/2024 00:01

No matter how close you might be they do keep their secrets.

DD was embarrassed about some of the things she'd been bullied about over the years so didn't discuss them.

Boys asking for naked photos and when refused bullying relentlessly. And those that gave in would of course be asked to produce worse and worse images and videos till it gets unbearable and

They try to cope, they may have good friends, but many bullies are very manipulative and so sophisticated like you wouldn't believe.

It fucks their heads up

If you have an inkling it's a form of bullying at her school and I'm pretty sure it's going to be then just get her out asap

Anxhor · 23/01/2024 00:03

Also I think a lot of DC may retreat further if forced to discuss what's going on with a relatively complete stranger ie GP CAHMS etc they just don't want to have to confront whatever it is

Anxhor · 23/01/2024 00:04

I hope you can sort it out OP

It's very distressing all round

Find the trigger

NeedAdvice2024 · 23/01/2024 00:19

I don't think the issue is school based, at least not in terms of bullying etc. so not sure that moving schools would help. She has just finished her first year of high school and about to start the second (we're in Australia) and I think that her stress is partly due to the huge change that comes with that. She came from a very small primary school into a very large high school which was quite the culture shock but if she changed schools she'd still be in this situation, just with the added stress of having to make new friends all over again.

She won't talk to me about what's going on and has only let me look at her injury once (it wasn't super bad, quite a few scratches that she did with scissors but nothing that cut deep) so I'm really struggling to know what to do to help.

I've been taking her phone every night and reading her messages to try to get a clue but so far have only discovered that she was upset when our cat died suddenly and traumatically a few months ago, and that she was anxious about a music performance at school. A new friend of hers then 'diagnosed' her with depression and anxiety, keeps asking her if she has self-harmed and keeps telling her not to kill herself. To be honest I think this new friend has put these thoughts in her head as I can't imagine that she would ever have thought about hurting herself before, but then you can't really know what's going on in another person's head. I thought I knew my daughter well and that we had the sort of relationship where she could tell me anything so I'm understandably feeling lost and confused and like I've totally failed her.

OP posts:
Anxhor · 23/01/2024 00:22

'She's worried now that this will blow up much bigger than she imagined'

'I don't think she realised how serious it is. I don't think she'll welcome regular counselling, checkups, etc. but I know we have to do whatever it takes to keep her safe'

I'll be honest I barely touched upon my DD self harming at the time with her whilst talking

I let her know I'd seen it - she felt awkward abd embarrassed

Did she want to talk about it - No she did not

Did she want to move school - she wasn't sure

Was it school / friendship related - YES

Did she kind if I changed her school - No she did not mind

BINGO

Barely much of a conversation but it was enough

I didn't want to make it all worse by making a huge song and dance about it

I had to force myself to stay calm and unemotional

After We spoke briefly, I knew it could only be school related from what little DD divulged so was emailing that night and on the phone the next day

It could only really have been school related at that age. It definitely wasn't a family member or friend of the family, neighbour type of thing so school it was

Anxhor · 23/01/2024 00:27

You're making good headway OP (not to sound condescending)

It's difficult finding these things out re each child

could well be triggered by her beloved cats death, larger school etc

lilsparrow · 29/04/2024 21:58

Hi, my last week has been a living hell, just reading all the posts so know you all know what that sick feeling is when you discover your baby is self harming. It’s been 2 months and thank fully I caught it after finding a blade and plasters. Gut wrenching.
my daughter has always been shy and nervous about public speaking in class which she says is the reason but I also picked up that her friend self harms and talks of suicidal thoughts. Surely that is a heavy thing for her to deal with, she says it’s not but I’m not so sure. So difficult to get them away from a friend you feel isn’t good for them. I feel my life has changed completely, we are a happy close family it’s like a bad dream. I think I’ve got through to her now I just have to be on high alert. She’s 15, I’ve got counselling booked and school involved but she doesn’t open up. So hard feel for everybody, much love ❤️

NeedAdvice2024 · 30/04/2024 01:07

lilsparrow · 29/04/2024 21:58

Hi, my last week has been a living hell, just reading all the posts so know you all know what that sick feeling is when you discover your baby is self harming. It’s been 2 months and thank fully I caught it after finding a blade and plasters. Gut wrenching.
my daughter has always been shy and nervous about public speaking in class which she says is the reason but I also picked up that her friend self harms and talks of suicidal thoughts. Surely that is a heavy thing for her to deal with, she says it’s not but I’m not so sure. So difficult to get them away from a friend you feel isn’t good for them. I feel my life has changed completely, we are a happy close family it’s like a bad dream. I think I’ve got through to her now I just have to be on high alert. She’s 15, I’ve got counselling booked and school involved but she doesn’t open up. So hard feel for everybody, much love ❤️

Hi lilsparrow, your timing is impeccable. After several months of counselling and nurturing and DD seeming back to her old self, last night I found messages to her friend saying she has cut herself again. DD has also mentioned in her messages that she thinks she's fat and ugly which is a new thing as she never had body issues before, as far as I know. So not only am I again hyper-vigilant looking for cuts on her body, I also have to make sure she's eating enough and not hiding food/throwing up.

I don't know how to approach it with her. I had promised not to look at her messages again unless I was concerned about something and she wasn't talking to me about it and I had stuck to that promise. At the start of the recent school holidays I could tell something was bothering her but she wouldn't tell me what. DH snooped on her messages and couldn't see anything concerning but he didn't look at all the apps. I grabbed her phone while she was in the shower last night and my heart sank. I just don't know what to do now. She refuses to see a counsellor again, won't talk to the doctor and won't talk to me or DH about it.

OP posts:
lilsparrow · 30/04/2024 23:32

Hi NeedAdvice,

I’m so sorry to hear that you are also going through this and with the added eating problem. It’s almost like we think we have cracked parenting and suddenly we are back to square one but it’s a darker place that’s so hard to accept.
my Daughter is adamant it’s all in the past. Tonight I was checking her over and putting on the savlon trying my best to count them as I’m only allowed to do it all briefly. There are a large amount of cut marks in 3 months that shocked me.
she has an obsessive nature when she’s into something but it’s usually a hobby and it’s often short lived. I’m just not satisfied that she can stop herself from turning to this if she’s not allowing us to talk through the anxiety issue. My daughter has social anxiety in very specific situations which is what I think is the root of the problem. I think I’m starting to process this last week but only because I feel more in control. Deep down I’m not fully sure I am, how can we reallY know. I wish I could see her phone but that’s tough with the password and face ID crack ! Much love and strength ❤️

theurbanpigeon · 01/05/2024 00:31

will caveat this by saying I'm no expert but wanted to offer a slightly different perspective.
I'm not a mother but have struggled with SH at various points in my life (am nearly 30 now). My mum was aware and reacted similar to you - very upset, caring, vigilant etc.

I'd encourage you to try not to make her feel overly scrutinised / like you're constantly staring at her body looking for cuts. SH is a strange thing but she very likely feels embarrassed and stressed and you reacting very negatively is only going to compound those feelings of shame and make her want to hide it from you (even though your reaction is if course completely reasonable). Talk to her about it, but try to keep a calm and moderate approach - don’t make her feel panicked (even though it's hard, don’t let her see how upset you are). She might say she doesn't want to talk about it, which is ok, though part of her probably does so maybe think of ways that you can have a gentle, judgement-free conversation (maybe going for a walk or in the car or something)?

In my experience there isn't necessarily a single root cause - it varies for everyone but life is hard sometimes and we all reach for different coping mechanisms. SH is obviously not a good one but once you've gone down that road the habit can be hard to shake. Counselling is probably a good idea as ultimately it's about finding healthier ways to manage negative feelings (I found CBT helpful), and you can't necessarily fix that for her. But making yourself genuinely approachable by showing that you aren't judging her and you aren't going to freak out if she SHs might help her to let you in so you can work together towards finding a solution for her.

Wishing you the best. - sorry for the ramble :) x

lilsparrow · 01/05/2024 08:19

Thank you, I’m sorry to hear you went through this yourself and thank you for your advice. It is such an alien situation to me that I have only heard of and never imagined would happen to my daughter. It’s opened my eyes so much in many ways. My main emotion was a deep sadness as if I had let her down, I still feel I have. I think as mums we can be so busy and when they seem they don’t need you as much and look happy we just get on with life, I’d recently started hobbies again and felt this new sense of freedom my kids being more independent, now I hate myself for going swimming knowing I’d left her in bed possibly self harming. I will never rest on my laurels again that’s for sure. I think my emotions were high initially I howled crying and she was shocked and I wish I’d have stayed calm. Right now we are having lots of fun times …. Watching drag race UK together has really helped. My main hurdle is to teach her to talk which I think is going to be hard. I’m not pushing but I have to encourage it I can’t see any other way she can overcome this without communicating her anxiety. Thanks you ❤️

123dogdog · 01/05/2024 11:26

I don’t have kids, but I have self harmed (I say have but it’s more of long term comes and goes sort of thing for me).

I started about age 9, fairly consistent until 14 when it escalated. No one ever found out until I was 23. 14-23 mine was largely on, as opposed to off. Age 22 it escalated again. People only found out because I just stopped caring about hiding it. The past year (I’m late 20s now), it’s deescalated again, not stopped but not a whole lot of an issue now. I think about doing it often, but I just think, as much as I want to, it’s too much hassle.

for me, I’m not really sure why, I am autistic and have various significant mental health issues, but I’d never heard of it when I started doing it. It varied why I did it, as in the direct effects.

self harm is not necessarily wanting to die or trying to die, it’s often a way to not die, or sometimes people who self harm has no relation to wanting to die. It can change and go between these things but sometimes it doesn’t. It might escalate but equally it might not.

some teenagers do it for a bit and never do it as an adult. Others it will continue for a long time. There’s no rule as such.

I could never express a reason for it, it was just that I wanted/needed/deserved it, not always in a bad way but in a if I do this I’ll feel better.

I realise now, in this moment, it’s not at all a good coping mechanism and I don’t condone it in anyway. But it does just take over, it’s very much an addiction for a lot of people. But for a long time I did think it was a good idea and it was helping. I think that much less now but I still have my moments.

im not really sure what im trying to say, apart from maybe give some insight. I’ve tried to be vague and not specific, so hopefully what I’ve written is okay.

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