I find mornings such a huge struggle, so full of anxiety - how do I ease this?

[Goldenbrowntexturelikesun]

I have (for a long long time but it’s getting worse) struggled so much during the AM of my day, to the point that I actually have to build my day around this (ie not working/meeting anyone or booking appointments etc until later in the day).

It’s so very restricting and causes me so much anguish.

As soon as I wake (7am in the week to get dd up), my anxiety kind of ‘switches on’ (I have suffered from anxiety since early childhood, around 45+ years). I feel panic, my heart starts racing and I feel as though all of the tv screens in my brain get switched on and they all start blaring at me at once. All of my personal life stresses etc all screaming at me too. I also suffer from health anxiety and I have this mental body scanner which switches on and scans my body for worrying ‘symptoms’, causing more anxiety ffs!

I also have IBS (exacerbated by physical issues ie endometriosis but also made so much worse by the anxiety), so my guts start playing up too and most days won’t calm until mid day or later. This creates a further vicious anxiety/symptom cycle. I have tried literally everything to ease my digestive issues but nothing, absolutely nothing helps long term.

By mid day things start to ease a little, not often as I can feel the anxiety, the jitters, the muscle tension, the non stop brain chatter all day but 99% of the time, by evening I feel the best I feel all day, much calmer, I can relax more and feel less physical issues too.

I listen to the Calm app every day and evening (and another IBS meditation), I exercise every day (fast walk with the dog twice a day up to 2 hours), I only drink water, no stimulants at all, very plain diet (due to the gut issues). I try to do all I can for these issues and maybe I’d be worse without the things I already do but all these things have minimal effect imo.

It feels as though my cortisol levels ramps up to the max in the mornings and I just do not know what I can do to reduce or ease it. I hate it, it leaves me feeling shit (physically as well as mentally) and completely restricted because I literally wish the day away so I can reach the calmer, more relaxed evening time. I am wishing huge chunks of my life away.

Any suggestion what I can do/take? I am sitting here now feeling so jittery, anxious and bone tired from it all and it’s only 9.30am.
I’ve tried several antidepressants but they make me feel worse. As I’ve mentioned I do the Calm app and have had endless CBT but still this continues without much relief.

Any suggestions? Anyone else feeling this or have been through this?

This video should help you understand it;

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Thank you Eyesopenwideawake

how is your life in general OP? outside of the anxiety. Are you doing a job you hate, in a relationship that sucks? Did you have a difficult childhood? You might have some trauma, maybe even something of which you are unaware (e.g. in early childhood your mum had PND, or something you were too young to remember) that needs addressing.

It is likely that the anxiety is the symptom and you need to look at the actual cause. Once that is addressed you might find the anxiety eases off.

Look into solving any general life issues, getting some therapy etc etc. CBT can also be helpful but as you say you've done that it is likely to be something else (CBT is again focussed on symptoms and behaviour rather than deeper root causes so has limited effectiveness IMO).

Sometimes it is necessary to go deeper rather than try just to cure the symptoms.

You have just described my life when I'm in a bad anxiety spiral (which can lasts months), anxiety is always worse in the morning, I also have IBS which rules the morning time and GERD and health anxiety so every morning I wake and start scanning "am I nauseous? What's my bowels like this morning? Have I got reflux flaring up right now? Did I get enough sleep? What have I got to do today? How am I going to get through all the tasks?" It's exhausting.

I couldn't just read and run OP. I suffer from depression and anxiety BUT my anxiety is nothing like yours. I just want to say I really hope someone on this thread can help. It sounds absolutely awful and it would seem that you are doing all the right things to try and tackle it. Sending hugs xx

I totally sympathise @Goldenbrowntexturelikesun as I feel like this most mornings too! I too have suffered from anxiety and depression in varying degrees since adolescence which I had under control with antidepressants for a good 10 years but this last year I have been getting this awful morning anxiety resulting in panic attacks and tearful episodes which last well into early afternoon. I also feel marginally better and calmer by the evening but then I go to bed dreading the same thing happening when I wake up, it’s exhausting!
I have recently switched my antidepressants to see if this will help but I’m still waiting for them to settle and things seem to be getting worse. I can’t really offer any advice but I just wanted to say I really do understand and you are not alone in feeling like this! Have u been to see your gp recently to see what they suggest? I have private counselling alongside my meds which does help put things in perspective x

Forgot to say my gp did prescribe propanalol to take in the mornings which I find does give a bit of a relief from the physical symptoms of anxiety and makes me feel slightly calmer x

Life is ok, I’m happily married, 2 dc teens (both doing ok). Lovely childhood. Mum has Alzheimer’s sadly and that’s obviously sad and quite stressful. It really feels like such a physical thing though. I am 51 so obviously in peri and feel this is having quite an impact, can’t take HRT atm though as I’ve just been diagnosed with endometriosis and my GP is loathe to give me anything with oestrogen in incase it exacerbates the condition. So I have to wait to see the endo specialist.

That’s exactly how my mind plays with me Nogodsnomasters, constant what ifs, it’s draining before the day has even began. I have GERD too, not a great combo, is it?

Thank you Mollyplop999

Whycantgiraffesdance thank you, I really feel,for,you, it’s just horrible isn’t it? I do have a GP appointment next week, I will ask if I can try something, I think I definitely need something and I will ask the propranolol as I’ve been wondering for some time if that may help?

@Goldenbrowntexturelikesun I find the propanalol helps just calm me down a bit if I’m getting the rapid breathing and panicky feelings. Definitely worth a try. I have 40mg tablets, they gave me 10mg originally but that did absolutely nothing! And I totally agree about it being a physical thing, I just seem to have a constant knot of anxiety in my stomach, no matter how much I try to switch my brain off and think positive it is always there!

This kind of morning anxiety is very, very common in peri-menopause/menopause, and AD's often make it much worse and are not recommended for treatment. If you can, you should go to a private clinic as soon as possible.

Do you work?

One thing that massively helps me in the morning is getting up a bit earlier - leaving me more time. I stay calmer and don't have ti get the kids up straightaway.

Oh op I'm sorry we're in the same boat. The GERD and IBS combo is horrible. I feel like the conditions cause me anxiety (because of the health anxiety) but yet they're chronic daily conditions that I can't avoid.

I do, luckily only part time.

I feel the same Nogodsnomasters, it’s a horrible vicious cycle.

I have tried literally everything to ease my digestive issues but nothing, absolutely nothing helps long term.

Have you tried hypnotherapy/remedial hypnosis? It's a recommended treatment for IBS and (should) have the added advantage of helping your anxiety.

Have you been tested for coeliac disease? For years my mum was told her stomach problems were likely down to IBS (pain, diarrhoea after eating, lots of wind). But I eventually persuaded her to ask for a blood test for coeliac and it was positive.

Eyesopenwideawake I had years of gut directed hypnotherapy and behavioural hypnotherapy also. I have recently been diagnosed with endometriosis, I’ve been told that this is exacerbating my gut issues.

MarilynBoo I’ve had loads of tested over the years including blood tests for coeliac, 2 colonoscopies, 2 gastroscopes with bisopies (including coeliac screening), bile acid malabsorption scans and a pill camera endoscopy. Although I do t have coeliac disease I am worse when eating bread but I think that’s the wheat as it’s high fodmap. I think my endometriosis makes the gut issues worse.

Have you seen the latest research on gut microbes and neurology? It’s fascinating and makes you wonder how what we eat affects our brains…

https://www.ted.com/talks/kathleen_mcauliffe_do_gut_microbes_control_your_personality

It’s something I’ve been very interested in for a while. I am trying to build up my microbiome as I had been on the low fodmap diet for far too long, which can really impact the levels of good bacteria.
I keep reading how low levels of certain bacteria can really affect mental health.

Hi Op, I know it's been a few months but any change in your circumstances, did you ever try the propanolol? I've started citalopram recently and still seeing no improvement in my morning panic.