Is it just me now ( I'm certain it is!)

[bestofmemummy]

I Really need a head wobble and a hand hold mumsnet !
I truly feel I am the only one whom still worries and gives thought to covid behaviour and etiquette and I desperately need to find some middle ground in my mind.

somewhere between following rules and things easing off I have got myself so jumbled it seems to feed into my everyday life where it is really becoming too much. I have this bizarre hang up that if I dont check every time myself or child displays a minor or typical symptom of covid I am somehow irresponsible and not caring about those around me or part of the problem it will still spread!

its riduculous but making me really sad and anxious . The more I read on here about peoples experiences it seems to help because I read for myself how the world is really just getting on with it and people learning to live with it...Its like I seek reassurance that its ok if my child has a cold !

I am fully on board with managing illness and irrelevant of what it is I would stay home and away from others until we felt better but with covid its really skewed my brain ..like teachers or family or friends would be thinking bad of me for so much as sniffling yet im ok with it in the reversere if it the other person or kid that was a little under the weather I can compute that as its just a cold or she's just getting on with it yet for me it totally floors me.

when I read on here that other have to go Into work ( even nhs staff ,teachers etc) it makes me feel like that really is getting on with living with it so its ok to go ahead and just make your judgement calls when its needed about illness. but then with me its like its not allowed and im a terrible person if I got it wrong and really did have covid and didn't know.

If your still reading I appreciate it truly ..I think I just need to be told by strangers im being ridiculous and get on with it now . Clearly I've taken moral responsibility way too far and its caused me severe anxiety .

You need to stop seeing covid as one illness, it’s just a virus like any other bug or flu.
No need to test for it, if you’re ill, you’re ill. It’s just a virus.

This behaviour sounds similar to OCD in some ways.

Yes, we can confirm it is ok to move on now - but I think you know that.

To be honest I remain really angry that this type of behaviour was encouraged at the height of covid. The way that personal responsibility was made out to be the cornerstone of tackling the illness to me was totally inappropriate and wrong.

I have been told its a bit OCD and I probably have to agree..I embarassed if im honest that I am this way because its really stopping me in my tracks but because I feel I can't talk about it anymore because everyone is handling it wayyyy better than me its something I feel really alone with thus reaching out here.

the scaremongering really got me hey :( truly believing my son can't stay at his grandmas incase he gets poorly and gives her something ...

I totally understand where you are coming from and do struggle with accepting Covid as just another virus, hard not to when we have just come from being told that we personally could basically kill someone if we don’t follow rules! That said, it’s no way to live a life and you do need to see what you can do to ease the pressure on yourself. Being cautious is fine but it sounds like these worries are getting so perhaps it would do you good to have a chat with a counsellor

Sounds like health anxiety but limited to Covid. Did it have a severe impact on your life?

everyone is handling it wayyyy better than me

Um, how do you know that?

I don’t think you are alone, a lot of elderly people especially seemed to stay out of the world after covid. They seem to report more about illness now in general in the papers. Covid was a risk to health service- if everyone had caught it, for the first time, within months of each other, it would have had awful consequences with the health system totally overwhelmed.

But now between the vaccines and some natural immunity, it has been reduced to a threat level that is the same as the flu, which is not nothing, but more manageable for the health service. So the daily medicalisation of life is not necessary.

i agree on speaking to a professional. You seem stuck in that time of anxiety and are finding it hard to move on.

ive had it twice and my DH and son also had it and having it bizzarley did not worry or stress me half as much as the worry or responsibility of not knowing being with people and then the next day getting ill and knowing I might have given someone something.

yes your right I dont know at all I just feel really alone and like I haven't moved on if I bring it up as a topic of conversation with people.

For the vast majority of people Covid was always just like other Corona viruses - manageable.

For some people it was dangerous and there was no vaccine. This was predominantly people with certain medical conditions, or of a certain age etc.

Those who would be high risk from Covid are now getting annual vaccinations, just like flu.

Most people getting Covid get normal virus symptoms, like they do from the myriad of similar viruses. Those whose situation increases their risk from Covid get vaccinated. That's why we can act like it's a cold - because the risk has been managed for those who are at risk of serious complications. Most of us never were.

Everyone who has had a vaccine, or Covid, now has antibodies that fight off the virus.

The original risk has been reduced.

During Covid the Govt did a national study with people testing and filling in lengthy questionnaires. This later included blood samples to confirm antibodies. My dd and I took part. Thousands of people did.

This study is still going on - I did one last week. The Govt are very much monitoring Covid - there are no current restrictions because there is no reason or need for them.

So sorry to hear you are feeling so anxious.

I can tell you that this is irrational and not normal/expected behaviour at all.

I know when I feel anxious I can't see the truth and I need certain people to tell me that they are not scared about the same thing to make me feel better. I need to hear it.

I agree with Floorwipes - the scaremongering we were all subjected to has clearly given people mental health problems. I personally don't think this sounds like health anxiety as you are not scared of being ill but scared of passing on Covid. I do agree it's an OCD pattern.

The best book I ever read about anxiety was 'Its just a thought' by Dr Amy Johnson and I also listen to her podcasts and then I had some therapy online with one of her coaches in the UK over zoom - it changed my anxiety completely.

I would definitely recommend you get some sort of help. This might need some professional support to shift and I would say your GP could be a good start.

Keep talking we are here for you to hold your hand xx

If it helps, I've had covid twice, once at the very early start, which was quite strong and similar to flu. I had it again recently, and it was barely a cold. The virus has morphed and changed and is no longer a risk like it was. By the way, I was unjabbed both times I had it (best friend is a consultant surgeon advised me against it as we were trying for a baby, and I had immunity after my first bout. The second bout was over a year after, and I have asthma, totally fine) You don't need to be scared of it anymore. Flu will do more harm at this point. Xx

I cannot thank each and everyone of you enough for taking the time to reply to me. in my quest to show my family and friends I am strong and am managing things ive closed up and yet on here I found people whom I can talk to . its made my a tad emotional .my heart felt thanks . I am taking on board everything you say and actions to take

I'm not surprised some people are left with enduring anxiety. We can't just switch things like that on and off. The response to Covid and propaganda has killed more people and ruined more lives than the actual illness.