Absolutely no point to my life

[Solo222]

I'm not even sure why I’m posting … perhaps someone has felt like me and managed to turn things around??

I think I just need to get this off my chest. I had a large family and raised them alone as EXH walked out. Now they are grown and independent and doing their own thing (which I am really pleased about) but my life is now just a big ‘nothing-ness’

I had a relationship 7 years ago that ended. Been single since. I’m unattractive (and very uninteresting) so never had any interest from men (tried OLD … and nothing).

Having been sole caregiver for my family for 15 years now my life is just work 9-5 and housekeeping. Gym when I can to help with an injury but I don’t get any pleasure from it. No close friends, no interests, very little money.

Pretty sure no-one would give a shit if I disappeared. This has been building for years but I feel at the end of the line now. I’ve tried so hard to pull myself together, all manner of self help. Every day for years wishing I hadn’t woken up and desperately searching for a fix. I’m tired of trying and just don’t care any more. I’m just a waste of oxygen. I’m thinking why bother fixing my hair or going to the gym or taking vitamins … nothing matters or makes any difference anyway so it’s just futile.

According to dr’s bloods (inc hormones) all fine. So it’s not physical. AD’s and therapy were no help.

If you’ve read my drivel - thank you.

Pretty sure there's more than enough oxygen in the world so please don't worry about that...

To be honest most people's lives are not dissimilar to your own; work, housework, eat, sleep. What you do have that they don't is freedom from external responsibility - no dependent kids or aged parents to care for. I can see that that leaves you in a bit of no man's land which is, I guess, why you feel the way you do at the moment.

In another life what would you have done differently? And what makes your pulse beat that little bit faster, i.e. what intrigues you? What would be on your bucket list?

On a practical note you could get some extra money and company from a lodger (or two). Or even a pet can make a huge difference when you dread going home to an empty space.

Sorry to hear that you feel like that 💐💐. Do your children visit you?

It might be worth having a think about what you want to achieve next year. If you would like more friends then you could join some groups where you are likely to find like-minded people with similar interests to you who you could bond with (and in time hopefully form closer friendships with). There are all sorts of groups out there.

If would like to meet a companion then you could try online dating? Lots of people meet lovely partners through the internet.

Hope 2024 is a better year for you!