Severe anxiety / ocd I can’t cope .

[Ellamaee]

I would like to hear your experiences with severe anxiety (mostly health)
im 22 and have always had health anxiety but since having my baby who is now 2 months old it has spiralled . I’m constantly worrying about her health , mine aswell and I’m feared that I have an eating disorder due to not eating anything that I believe will be bad for me for example preservatives in bread and mostly all foods sweeteners sugar etc and means I’m not eating cause anything in my house is all stuff with crap in it (meant to cause all these illnesses) convinced myself I have the big C word , or something wrong with my heart cause of palpitations. Numbness etc just feel like I’m not gonna see my child grow up . Doesn’t help I have periodontal disease and been told that it links to all these illnesses too so I obsessively brush . I keep trying to tell myself we all must die of something to calm me down then I go on to social media and all I see is death , suddenly aswell and people my age or younger / not much older . Please , anyone like me how long have you been like this and I’m worried that the cortisol is gonna make me ill anyway / why is life so unfair :( sorry it’s a long one

Oh sweetheart that sounds awful. Ask your GP to do a full blood count to rule out any physical causes such as anemia, thyroid issues and B12 deficiency. Mums are tough, you will get to the other side of this.

I sympathize. I could have written your post myself. I have had severe anxiety also about my health for almost 15 years now. I developed OCD type behaviour and really bad intrusive thoughts after me son was born 18 months ago. It got so bad. I also hav heart palpitations, panic attacks, countless vague physical symptoms. I've had blood tests, heart monitors, ECG, you name it, I've had it b cais I am convinced all the time I'm sick or dying. Its taken over my life. My life is dictated by it. Just breathe and try to remember that you need to be well for your little one. Go to your doctor and tell them, tell your health visitor, they can help you too. Also, if you have it where you live, you can self refer for Cognitive behavioral therapy which some people find useful, join a forum. I am a member of many peer groups and support groups and they have been helpful to reach out for support and know I'm not alone. I really feel for you OP. Its debilitating.

Op, I was just like you at your age (and still am 30 years later) and I was diagnosed with Asperger’s eight years ago. It might comfort you to know that I’ve been worrying for all that time and I haven’t been diagnosed with anything serious. I’m very fatigued from all the stress though. I would say don’t waste thirty years of your life like I have but mine is ongoing so I don’t know how you can avoid that. I know how terrifying it can be.