Self confessed control freak, stemming from a traumatic childhood. I did about 3 months of therapy which was great but had to stop as we couldn’t afford to continue. We had only really scratched the surface but it helped to understand my need to control absolutely everything in my life.
What we never got as far as was discussing ways to let go of that control. I have to be in charge of everything, I give my husband jobs to do and then double check them, I have a budget spreadsheet that I update every time I spend anything to help me feel in control of my finances. It’s obsessive and exhausting. If anything goes ‘wrong’ - the baby doesn’t nap exactly as long as I thought she would/we’re running late/she didn’t eat dead on 5:30pm then it’s like the world is ending and I panic.
I just want to go about my life like a normal person. I’m on sertraline for post natal depression and anxiety, but the need to be in control has become much worse since the birth of my daughter 16 months ago.
Has anyone been in this boat and has suggestions or methods to try and take a step forward? My family think I’m just dramatic but they don’t understand the visceral feelings I get when I feel out of control.