How do you get out of a rut?

[Greenspace81]

Tips for getting back on track please. Not getting of bed, barely eating or leaving the house, signed off sick. can't afford for this to continue but feel stuck in a loop.

Firstly, you have my sympathy for dealing with this horribleness. Mental ill health is very cruel. Please be kind to yourself.

Sometimes a bit of time in bed is part of the process but I totally understand you would like to break the cycle.

From experience, I can’t say it boils down to more than just psyching myself up to it and forcing just a small change/step forward. Eg can you walk to the shop and buy a pint of milk? Or if not that then literally walk around the block or to the end of the street and back. Or do one small job in the house - empty half of the dishwasher or clean one surface.

Are you on medication? Or waiting list for any talking therapy?

Same as above, I find it’s not just one thing, at my worst I made myself go into shops and say hi to people which sounds weird but the more I did it the better it makes me feel. Also the little things everyone prattles on about but which work sometimes- fresh air, petting an animal, a bit of pampering- so even making myself have a shower and shave legs or put on nail varnish. Making myself ring a friend or family member is probably my hugest route out. Also books/magazines, easing off social media. Sorry amn’t more help, take care x

Music is my saviour. I put on my favourite tracks on you tube in my living room tv and once they are done it leads me to other things I’ve forgotten about which makes me smile too.

I dance about. Exercise and happy music raises the serotonin in the brain that makes us happy. I try and encourage it!

You could also do gratitudes. Think of say three things a day that you’re glad of.

It’s easy, quick and it retunes my brain somehow if I’m fed up or angry or something.
I don’t know how it works, it just does. Try it for a week and see if it helps you too. Pick just one thing to start if you want. I just do three a day. Too many could get tedious.

Today mine are:
i am grateful for the sun being out when I went to the shops.

i am grateful for my central heating which is lovely and warm.

i am grateful for my best mate being in my life.

I have sworn on here about this for a while but I still do it. I set my phone timer for 10 mins. It goes really quickly, doesn’t feel unachievable and it’s amazing what you can do in 10 mins (strip the bed, have a shower, unload dishwasher) then as soon as the time goes off I would stop. Right in the middle of something. I just stop. Then 10 mins rest. Then 10 mins ‘on’ again. Try 5 minutes at first even just to brush your teeth.

One of my big mental health "things" is not leaving the house. Particularly since I work from home a lot of the time. I then start to get agraphobia very badly and my mood dips and remains low.

So I try to make myself go out every day. Even if it's just to the local supermarket for a wander up and down the aisles and buying a bag of crisps. Getting there is one part, being amongst people is another. When I'm feeling good, making coffee dates, going for a walk, or visiting a gallery or museum are things on my list.

Is there a bus stop near you? You could just take the bus somewhere and get the next one back. Then work up to getting off, going for a coffee, then going home.

In the evening could you manage to put out your clothes for the following day. Put them somewhere close to the bed. Make it easier for yourself to get dressed.

I find washing my hair makes me feel a lot better. Could you try for that one day? Then a quick wash and dressed?

A lot of the time it's just making one step, and that shoves you on to another.

I really appreciate how difficult it is, and it might take you two or three days to get psyched up enough to do anything. But a plan to do one small thing might help you achieve that thing.

I have bipolar 2 and clinical depression. I usually have about three weeks of depression a month - some months are worse than others and I don't get any 'ups' at all, sometimes for several months at a time. Those are the worst.

I completely understand what your going through. Finding ANY motivation, even just enough to clean your teeth, is just SO hard! I have times where I go several days without showering, basically until I just can't stand the way I feel enough to have one. Or, if I have to go somewhere that I can't get out of.

Sometimes, I can't concentrate enough to read. Or even watch television. I sometimes sit in the same spot for hours, just staring into space - that's when I know I need to take additional medication.

I have several pets, so I do have to get it together enough each day to feed and water them, make sure I have enough supplies of what they need etc. They keep me going and I'd be in big trouble without them.

I don't really force myself to do anything I don't absolutely have to do. I wait until motivation strikes again (and it always does, even if fleeting) to do anything non-critical. I often feel embarrassed and ashamed by the state I let myself and my home get into - sounds weird, but I'm actually incredibly fanatical about my house and my own personal grooming. But only when it comes to others seeing me or the house. My home is clean and hygienic because I have a cleaner (I have to, my mental health would be even poorer without it), but when I'm in a slump I tend to let things get untidy. Take things out and don't put them away, leave stuff lying around, don't pick up the animals' toys, don't make the bed, etc. I usually spend 20 mins tidying before the cleaner comes instead.

Absolutely nobody knows how I live. They'd be horrified if they did! My family especially. However, they know not to visit without asking first and they also know that I sometimes need to switch my phone to voicemail because I can't handle talking to anyone. They know they can check on me via text message and I will always answer. Same if there's a family emergency.

I also try to spend a lot of time in nature, even if it's just sitting in the garden. I live in the country, so I sometimes jump in the car and drive somewhere quiet and beautiful. I find nature comforts me more than just about anything else.

My point is that you need to be kind to yourself. It's SO important. Take the pressure of yourself by not constantly picking on yourself for not doing non-critical things. So what if you don't have a shower for a few days, if you're the only one who has to smell yourself? You won't die! So what if you can't do the vacuuming? I sometimes have cat hair tumbleweeds in my house!

Nurture yourself, be gentle with yourself. If you don't put pressure on yourself, you'll find that your motivation for life comes back quicker. Nobody ever died from not hoovering for a couple of weeks.

Blessings to you - go gently.