Is this an unusual amount of things to have to cope with…

[IndiKid2015]

Chronically ill parent from age 5
Serious illness in immediate family (sibling) at age 11
Discovery of parents affair at age 14
Loss of two friends at a young age
Broken engagement
Miscarriage
Own cancer diagnosis when children were very small
Alopecia leading to complete hair loss
Bankruptcy - bailiffs at door
Discovery of parents second long term affair leading to breakdown of now elderly parents marriage creating two dependents overnight.

I’ve managed to keep going through all of that but now I’m having work problems brought about by a new job and I’m really struggling, anyone would be though wouldn’t they?

Yes, it's a lot. I'm sorry you're struggling. Have you got RL support? Could you ask your GP for a counselling referral to help you process all that's gone on in the past?

What's the issue with the new job, exactly?

Yes, I think that's a lot! Sorry you had to go through all of that.

@MrsBennetsPoorNerves manager is on my case for not communicating regularly enough, I’m a middle manager in a new role similar to my last one but in a different organisation. I just got in with it where I was before so I’ve continued but now that’s not right.

Yes it’s a lot, but you don’t have to struggle on alone.

Have you had any sort of counselling/therapy at any point? It’s worth checking if your company offers anything but if financing/NHS provision is an issue there are lots of well being books that can help you at least start to process.

unfortunately for some of us the universe just likes shitting on us. A lot. sometimes you have to bat off responsibilities because it’s too detrimental to yourself. For instance having two separated elderly parents to deal with is a humungous amount of pressure. The problems they bring to you have to be delegated out wherever you can and in some cases just refused completely. You’re not letting them down, you’re protecting yourself.

Yes it is a lot and I think when things go on over a number of years you just keep going trying to cope but then eventually it catches up with you. This happened to me not as much as yours but multiple bereavements, upheaval, stressful job over many decades, violent suicides of two friends, son witnessing teenage friend killed by speeding driver etc. The last few years have been a lot calmer but it is still taking time to process things and get decent mental health back. You need to make time for yourself and draw on all the support you can.

I try to keep going and exercise really helps me but the difficulties just keep coming. I’m close to my sibling and I do have a partner but sometimes he’s not helpful and I think friends sometimes don’t know what to say. I’ve not had counselling, I’ve never been keen but maybe it would help.