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Mental health

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Friend having a crisis

2 replies

Isanyonereallyanonymous · 04/11/2023 16:31

New to this area of the board, not sure if trigger warnings are required but if so, warnings for suicide and alcohol.

Backstory:
I was friends with a guy at college, always just friends but quite close.
We lost touch when we left college (about 15 years ago) but we’re FB friends.
Last year we started swapping likes on posts etc and at the start of this year I messaged him and we’ve chatted on and off since then, sometimes daily, sometimes every few weeks. It was like we never stopped talking, we got in great and talked about all sorts of stuff.
Its been clear his mental health is poor but he won’t talk about it.

Today:
He’s messaged today to say he tried to kill himself recently, failed and now he’s trying to drink himself to death (suspect this isn’t the first time, his liver is pretty screwed and the dr’s have told him not to drink)
I don’t know where he lives (aside from the town) and I’m not in touch with any of our mutual friends from college anymore.
He’s wankered, that much is clear from his messages but he won’t say where he is, or let me go to see him and I’m at a bit of a loss? He’s very dear to me but I feel totally stuck. What do I do?!

OP posts:
SiouxsieSiouxStiletto · 05/11/2023 08:39

What an awful situation to be in. I have no idea how to help though. Hopefully this will give your post a bump.

Thingamebobwotsit · 05/11/2023 08:47

If you know the town you can try calling the emergency services and seeing if they can locate via electoral registers etc. If someone is experiencing suicidal ideation then this is the quickest way to get them help in the immediate crisis. They may already have a crisis team in place so it is also worth asking them if they would mind you calling them or a family member. The main thing is they shouldn't be on their own. You can also check in and recommend Samaritans etc. And remind him that he is valued as a friend and that he needs help.

I really feel for you as I am experiencing something similar in a different context. Sadly MH services are so stretched this in my case this is the 4th person in 3 years since lockdown.

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