Where to start with Therapy?

[StillFanta]

It's taken, many many Years of me hiding all my feelings away and I finally feel ready to confront them. I would love to have counselling/ therapy but haven't a clue where to begin!
Although I'm a positive and fiercely resilient person, my entire existence has been trauma after trauma after trauma.. I'm worried the person I see won't know where to start.
I hear the NHS waiting list is years, can anyone recommend how I source privately?
Thanks so much!

There are a couple of bodies that oversee counsellors, their directories are: www.psychotherapy.org.uk/find-a-therapist/?Distance=10 and www.bacp.co.uk/search/Therapists

It can take a while to find the right person. You might also have charities near you that provide low cost counselling, often through placement counselling students with some qualified volunteers. Good luck!

What do you want to achieve with the therapy, what do you want to change?

Knowing this, or at least being aware of the question, can be very helpful.

I started looking on counselling directory as it at least gives you peace of mind that they are all registered. Filter out the ones you can't afford and the ones you can't get to and make a shortlist.

Best advice I can give is to choose the therapist, not the type of therapy. I started out reading up on different modalities and I actually ended up with a counsellor who leans towards existential therapy. The one I didn't even consider. He was literally the only one who returned my call. But he is honestly the best decision I've ever made. Read their bio, look at their pictures.

Its one time when you actually should make a decision based on emotion. See who you feel drawn to. Meet a few for initial sessions and see who you click with. It's never going to be comfortable but you should feel safe. You're going to have some very honest conversations with this person if therapy works out well. It's a very strange relationship. Incredibly intimate but boundaried. You can totally judge a book by its cover

We've had sessions spent sitting in silence when I couldn't get the words out, conversations about sex that made me want to cringe right into the rug and everything from sobbing in despair to hysterical laughter after a particularly terrible date which he still hasn't stopped teasing me about. You need to be able to relax with them.
Go on instinct.

Really good that you have made the decision to change something. I'd start with this question: How does your trauma manifest in everyday life?

You could try better help? It's online and if you ask they can find you someone who specialises in trauma. I can give you a referral code if you want to try it?