come and tell me what you think really need some advice

[sazb]

hi there everyone,ive suffered depression for many yeARS now,but reasently felt better,untill a so called friend decided to cut me of completly,we were friends for over 3years and she emailed me,(which i thought was discusting as we were surposed to be best buddies) saying she couldnt make tomorow at all.il explain; went docs few weeks ago they refered my to hospital. and had a hospital appiontmant come through, and i invited her to dinner the day of apointmant as she says she would kindley come with me for moral surport,then as i said had this email saying all this,but was very confused so emailed her etc and said so.she say i dont give a shit about your feelings im feeling shit and basiclly dont want to know.its made me feel bad as a person,as i really dont know what ive done,and really as made me feel of no worth,i feel so angry and hurt,does it mean im a bad person.i really just dont know.im crying all the time,my partners so angry that she could do this,as its made me phisicly ill(sorry about spelling)just could do with you letting me know what you think.

Saz, sorry you are feeling so crappy.

This kind of thing can be really difficult to deal with....and I say this both as someone who has suffered depression over the years and who has tried to support a friend through depression.

It is obviously really horrible when you are down and depressed but, as I am sure you probably realise, at times we can put an awful lot of pressure on those around us. Depression is a very "selfish" illness and it can be hard to give back as much as we receive from a relationship.

perhaps your friend is having difficulties of her own at the moment and is struggling to give you the support you need and deserve while trying to do best for herself at the same time?

Maybe if you give her a little space and time she will realise that she has been rather hurtful and you'll be able to resume the friendship again?

I hope you feel lots better very soon. xxx

thank you feedmenow,ive always been surpotive of her thats why i carnt understand,if shes needed me to have all the kids etc ive been there,i surpose thats why i carnt understand.many thanks for your replie,xxxx

Some people are just not good at supporting people even if they are friends or family others are just there no matter what often it is people you do not expect to be.

It is nothing to do with you it is her (although I do the same if people are like that to me look for reasons I have caused it, I think it is part of my personality certainly since I have had depression.

It's possible that she is suffering from depression herself - or, as FMN says, she is just kind of burned out. I have had friends with bad depression and there did come points where I just had to back away from them because I was having troubles of my own... try not to think too harshly of her.

thanks kaz1967,i think i tend to think o mg i must have done something,but thats the way i am.madamez i do think shes going through a rough time but strange thing is shes only cut me out,but really i dont know why.ive desided im not going to even contact her to say well you know im here if you need me.as when i did she bassiclly said tuff i dont want to know.ive been thinking 3years ago she had this other friend when i first met her,and then this friend wasnt there anymore,im thinking maybe theres a patern.sorry to go on.but just really hurt.and angry that anyone could treat anyone in this way.xx

ive now found a lovely friend im my area who went through simler thing its lovely to talk to her,shes such a lovely person

Agree with madamez. Try not to take it personally

FWIW, I think depression can magnify feelings of inadequacy, loneliness, paranoia etc.

thanx sweetie