Feel like I’m on the verge of a breakdown but I can’t get help?

[Liverpoolgirl50]

I had vile postnatal depression with my first baby 1.5 years ago. I took sertraline and things improved. I moved GP surgeries when we moved house and they didn’t move my prescription over so I stopped cold turkey.

I was doing ok and then I found out in August I was pregnant - terrified of having the same postnatal depression I terminated the pregnancy last month. But now it’s back? Like a black cloud and I can’t breathe. I get white hot rage and I cry all the time. Tonight I just want to end everything, but I can see what it is through the fog, I recognise it this time. Except this time I’m not on mat leave, I’m working full time and I’m struggling to keep up appearances at work.

But my GP doesn’t book appointments in advance, they book on the day and every time I call at 8am they are already fully booked and just tell me I have to keep trying each day and that they are sorry, even when I tell them I’m worried I’m going to hurt myself, which is where I ended up the first time. They don’t do telephone appointments, or e consult. They are the only GP in the area, I can’t move. What else can I do? A&E feels ridiculously dramatic…but I need help.

If the issue is you not being able to get through on the phone you can download autodial apps that automatically redial until you can get through. This is how I get through to my gp, so much easier than getting cut of repeatedly. It's shit but keep trying.

Sorry your having such a crap time.

@CrystalDay thank you, I appreciate that. The issue is I ring them literally as soon as they open at 8am and the voicemail message is already there ‘our list is now full for the day, please try again tomorrow’. It’s a known problem in the area - people with probably far worse issues than mine unable to be seen, and they’ve been reported to the CQC. I just don’t know where else I can get the prescription or help I need x

Have you tried phoning 111?

Please go to A&E if you feel you might hurt yourself, this is an emergency and you need to get help x
Sorry that your GP is so rubbish, that’s appalling.

Any chance you could afford a private GP? There are online services that you might be able to access.

Can you ring 111? They might be able to help in the immediate future and they might be able to get in touch with your GP.

Our GP is the same if you ring, fortunately we can still turn up in person when they open the doors but I doubt it will last long because that's what everyone does now.

I hope you are able to get hold of someone soon

Thank you everyone - I actually haven’t tried 111. I hadn’t even thought of that - I will give them a call in the morning and see how far I get.

Can you do a private GP app and pay?

In that case I second trying 111.

If you are suicidal you should be able to speak to a psychiatrist by attending a&e but it will probably be a very long wait ( I waited 12 hours with an ex who had taken an overdose ).

Hope you manage to get something sorted soon.

Try 111 but you try getting in touch with the health visiting team. They can often help get you an urgent appointment with the GP.

you can also try*