Think I might be depressed and it’s scaring me

[Serenity1010]

Hello,

had a baby 2 years ago, I had bad post natal depression but managed to come through the other side, just recently I have been through an extremely stressful time with things out of my control and I can feel myself slipping back into a dark place. I don’t actually know if I’m depressed or if I’m being dramatic and over reacting.

I haven’t seen friends for over 2 months quite simply because I don’t want to. I don’t want to do anything apart from lie in bed in the dark, people tell me I need to set goals (example; make bed when I wake) but I don’t actually want to? I’ve got no energy, feel tired and moody all the time and when people ask if I am okay I get extremely defensive and tearful and shut the conversation down, I don’t want to eat, I have split with my sons dad and we have a good co-parent relationship however since he moved out I’m quite lonely.

I also hate loud noises and get extremely stressed as I just want everything to be quiet. I’m still able to go to work through the week but I find myself staring out the window daydreaming about not being here anymore, I don’t want to contact GP as worried to go on anti depressants however I don’t actually feel like I’m getting any better and I’m worried it’s going to get worse

I don’t wear makeup anymore and I don’t enjoy anything i used to enjoy. I feel like I clock watch from getting up in the morning to my sons bed time so I can just be alone and go to bed.

I love my son and still do fun things with him however I often feel like I’m not present as I’m feeling empty with no emotion.

really unsure whether I’m stressed or depressed and don’t want to waste anyone’s time really

Hi, sorry to hear you are having a difficult time. Much of what you describe could be attributed to depression, and for me stress can certainly be a trigger for depression. I think the best thing for you to do would be to speak to GP. What you describe doesn't sound trivial or in your head, and is certainly negatively impacting your daily life. So don't feel you are wasting their time. If it helps make a list of your issues so you don't forget to mention anything. GL.

This sounds like depression or burn out.

I've been depressed for the past 10 weeks plus , and I wish I'd reached out sooner. Feel free to call 111/02 but I definitely think the gp would be a good stepping point, Mind crisis cafe and the Samaritans have also been excellent support just when I'm feeling lonely.

Wish you well.

Make an appointment with your GP and tell them you don't want medication. They tried to push it on to me years ago which put me off trying to get help for a few years but there's Talking Therapy now. They say there's a long waiting list for it but I've had a monthly appointment with my GP and used him as temporary talking therapy. It's been two months since and I've just had a call from the Talking Therapy team.
Don't suffer in silence.
Don't know who you are but I can relate and I genuinely hope you find your mojo again soon.