Child said something and I can’t stop freaking out

[Scarlet2002]

I was putting our Dc(f4) to sleep and she was talking about what she wanted to be when she grows up and then after a bit she says “I am never going to grow up anyway (or something like that )” and now I can’t stop imagining horrific future events like illness or accidents etc. I will admit I am over anxious at times about stuff like getting hurt or things like security etc. is this normal?

it sounds like your anxiety is maybe becoming worse and more uncontrollable, don’t be ashamed to reach out for help with your GP, healthy minds/self help or if you can afford it private therapy.
its completely normal for a child to say these things, it is not normal for yourself to feel like this, but you don’t have to feel like this forever x

By not normal I do not mean abnormal, there are many people who suffer from anxiety like this you’re absolutely not alone! 💗

No, it’s not normal to get anxious about your child saying something like that.

Ring your GP on Monday and talk to them, it sounds like you need some help - perhaps something like CBT.

It’s important to get some help, because anxiety does tend to get worse if left untreated and it will impact on your kids.

Is it possible you might be overthinking it; did she mean more not growing up as she wants to stay a kid forever, as it's more fun?

Would be good to get some counselling maybe though if it is giving you this much anxiety and upsetting you

She probably means she wants to stay little with you as her mummy forever. It means she's happy as things are. Don't worry about it.

My 5 year old says he wants to live with me and marry me when he grows up, kids say stupid and weird shit, it doesn't mean anything op.

I’ve had a few “I’m not going to grow up “ and “I don’t want to be big” comments of my children around the same age . I think it’s just a throw away comment as the can’t grasp being older at this age they just live for the moment .

I can totally reason with why you feel anxious/ uneasy but try let it go . Maybe speak to your GP if you feel the anxiety is getting worse 💖

Children have no ability to conceive of them being 15/40/70!

It's a harmless comment.

She probably just meant that she doesn’t want to be an adult. My DS says to me he’s not going to be a grown up because being a grown up looks like too much hard work because you have to make dinner for yourself and tidy up!

Kids don't usually want to grow up. Being a kid is fun and being old is boring. It's very common for them to assert they're never going to grow up along with "I'm never going to put my shoes on", "I'm never going to talk to my brother, ever again" and "I'm never going to sleep".

In fact, when I first read your message, I couldn't even work out what the problem was, it took me a while to see it from your perspective. I think you've read far too much into a throwaway comment. Could you spend some time with friends or doing something you love and take your mind off worrying? Anxiety is easy to spiral into if you give it enough headspace.

Peter Pan.

It's not your dd's response that is concerning, but yours.

A lot of children will say they are never going to be an adult because to them it seems so far off and they think or want to be a child forever and the thought or being an adult seems strange to them!

It doesn't mean she has some awful premonition about her life being cut short!

Kids say crazy things all the time! When DC was 4 we were packing suitcases to go overseas to my cousins wedding. DC was playing next to us and asked about the trip. We told him about the hotel with the waterslides and all and then all of a sudden he said: Oh well, doesnt matter.
Me: What why? Dont you like waterslides? DC: Yea, but we’re all gonna die!
Me: What?!
DC: We’re all gonna die in the water.
Me: Who’s gonna die?
DC: You, Me, Daddy, Sister, Grandma, Geandpa, aunty xxx, uncle xxx
And he listed my whole family who was flying with us on the same plane! Everyone! Like 12 people! One couple took a different flight and I asked if they will die too and he said: Nah, they will be ok.
I was so freaked out about the flight! But nothing happened 🤣

what got to me is normally she always talks about growing up and can’t wait to be big as feels she is missing out! Perhaps it was a throw away but a bit out of character.. I guess I am a little isolated at the moment.

It's so hard to know what goes on in their little brains sometimes. I've sometimes had comments from my daughter that's made me really emotional..me and her dad split as babies and she says she wish she had just one house and one family, it's awful and I feel wretched and anxious about it. But all we can do is try and help them understand feelings and worries and work through them together if something is on their mind. I honestly think yours was a throwaway comment about not understanding one day she will be a grown up, I remember being a child and thinking I'd always be a child and not being able to get my head around being an adult one day!